Unrequited Love
by AgentNote
Summary: "Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love." -Charlie Brown. A Heya RPF fic. Rated T for language...possibly M later. Please read, ejnoy, and review!
1. Unrequited Love

**A/N: Hi all! This is something my mind's been cooking up for a while now, and I've finally gotten around to writing it. I originally intended to make this a Naya/Dianna fic (Nayanna?), but as I was typing it up, it veered itself towards Heya. Huh. What can I say? My writing has a mind of its own. Anyways, I want to know if you think I should keep it Heya or change it to Naya/Dianna. If I keep it Heya, I will definitely add a touch of Dianna/Lea on the side (more like Dianna/Lea longing), so for all of you Achele fans, do not panic. ;) I'll also have many Naya/Dianna friendship scenes if it ends up staying Heya. Anyways, enjoy! I really hope it's good, because it was a blast writing!**

**Note: The time frame is the beginning of the shooting of season three, so basically, now.**

**Note: Also, I've said this is Heya, but for now it is just a Naya and Heather fic. I am undecided about if I'm going to make it Heya romance…yet. ;)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee, nor will I ever (unless I somehow manage to take over the world—highly unlikely). Also, this is unbeta'd, so apologies in advance for any and all mistakes.**

**Rating: T for now...maybe M later?**

**Spoilers: To be safe, anything through season two. Later chapters may reveal spoilers I've read are going to happen in season three. **

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><p><em>Click<em>. _Click._

Damn it.

_Click. Click. _

Damn it!

_Click. Cli—_

"Ugh!" I yell furiously, throwing my sweatshirt across the room, avoiding flinging something heavier as to not break anything. "Stupid trailers!"

"Naya, you're going to have to let me in eventually! I'll stay out here as long as I need to."

I sigh. Why do Heather and I have to argue today of all days? This was supposed to be good. It was supposed to be fun. It was supposed to be the day in which we film the most ultimate scene that any Brittana fan could ever witness.

The first kiss.

Or so I call it. To me, that's what it is. Santana's first on-screen kiss. Sure, Santana and Brittany have, as the writers put it, "gotten there mack on" before, but that doesn't mean they've done it in front of millions of viewers.

"Naya!"

"Oh what the hell now…" I mutter to myself. All I want is for my stupid trailer door to lock, shutting out anyone and everyone. I just want to relax before I have to go out there and shoot that damn scene which, only an hour earlier, was perhaps the most exciting thing I was looking forward to all season. Not reuniting with everyone. Not seeing what everyone else's characters were going to be up to. Not even spending endless hours with Heather. I just wanted that damn kiss! I still _want_ that damn kiss! In the words of Santana: I needs ta get my mack on.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to act all pervy or whatever. I've certainly outgrown those days. Our characters may be in high school, but we most definitely are not. It sometimes feels like it, though, between acting like high schoolers all day, hanging out in classrooms and auditoriums, and dealing with the crazy drama I call Heather.

Oh Heather.

"Naya!" she screams at the top of her lungs. "You can't shut me out forever! I'm your best friend! Please, just talk to me! Tell me what I did wrong."

I lean my head against the door but don't make a move to open it. I try to lock it one more time and finally, it locks. I sigh, pinching the bridge of my nose, sensing a brewing headache. Walking over to my couch, I plop myself down, completely and utterly exhausted.

Why does she have to be so perfect? Why can't I just have one good day lately? Why couldn't this have been the best day of my life? Why can't I go out there and pretend like nothing is wrong and just enjoy the hell out of that kiss?

Oh right. A lot of reasons. One: It'd be wrong. Two: It wouldn't even be me kissing her, it'd be Santana. Three: I couldn't lie to her like that. Four: It'd be wrong.

Why can't I just have one good day? Why, why, why, why?

I press my hand against the side of my head.

Too many questions.

Headache.

Breathe in, breathe out.

Calm down, Naya.

Sighing, I stand up, walking over to the schedule on my desk. I check the times then check the clock on my wall. It reads 3:27. Great. Thirty-three more minutes to sort myself out, calm the hell down, and compose myself just enough to go out there, say a few lines, and give Heather the kiss of her life.

No, no, no! Just a regular kiss. Strike that. Not even that. A fake kiss. It's acting after all. That's what it's going to be for her, so that's what it will have to be for me.

A knock on my door interrupts my thoughts.

"If this is you, Heather, I swear…" I mutter to myself.

Peeking out the window, I notice Heather is walking off towards her trailer. Surprised that she finally gave up—Heather isn't the most defeated of all people—I wonder who's at the door. Walking over to it, I unlock it and yank it open.

"Dianna," I state, taken aback.

"Hey Naya. I saw Heather over here and heard her screaming her head off, so I thought I'd come and check if everything was alright."

"Um…yeah. Why don't you come in?" I back up, letting her in and then shut the door, promptly locking it. I don't want Heather to see I've let someone else in and give her the idea that she can waltz right in as well.

"So…is everything okay?" Dianna asks quizzically. She takes a seat on my couch and crosses her right leg over her left, her pale yellow colored dress riding up the tiniest bit. Her expressions is one of pure curiosity and a touch of concern. I shouldn't be surprised about that, though. Dianna is one of the kindest people I know.

I sigh, deciding to not lie, but not exactly give her the whole truth either. I need to work through things myself before I can let other people in on all of my secrets.

"Kind of. Heather and I have just been…going through stuff lately."

"What kind of stuff?"

I shrug. "I don't know how to explain it really. We've both just been busy thinking about…things. Well, I've been thinking about certain things more than she has," I mutter under my breath.

"What do you mean?" Dianna asks confusedly.

Oops. Didn't mean to say that loud enough for her to here. Think Naya. You have to say something or she's going to think you're hiding something from her. Wait. You _are_ hiding something from her. Uh-oh. Now she's looking at you weirdly.

"Nothing really. We just have different views on things, that's all."

Dianna, obviously sensing I'm having a hard time with this conversation, lightens up a bit and doesn't push my answer. Instead, she asks a different question.

"So are you ready for your scene?"

I'm shooting a few scenes today, but I don't need to ask her which one she's referring to.

"Not really," I reply honestly. "I'm thinking it's going to be kind of awkward what with all the arguing we've been doing lately.

Dianna nods, pondering this. I shift uncomfortably, moving the weight on my left foot to my right.

"Do you want me to go?" she asks suddenly.

"What? Why would you ask that?"

She shrugs in response. "I don't know. You just don't seem like yourself right now. You're clearly dealing with something, and I don't want to be here if you're trying to sort stuff out before you have to shoot the scene."

Wow. Can she read my mind?

"Dianna…"

She smiles. "It's okay, I get it. Well, I'll see you around Naya. Whatever's going on with you and Heather, you should try and fix it." She says it sweetly, with no push or glint of anger in her voice at all. "You two are best friends. Naya without Heather is like a peanut butter and jelly sandwich without the jelly. Wouldn't work. Not an option."

I give her a weak smile. "Thanks, Di. You really are the greatest, you know that?"

She gives me a sad smile in return, almost as if she's trying to believe she's the greatest but failing miserably.

"If you say so, Naya."

I open the door for her and thank her again. I watch her make her way down the stairs and off towards set. She and Lea had some scene to work on today and I'm sure she's going to costume or hair and makeup.

Checking the time again, I notice I only have ten minutes before I have to get to hair and makeup as well.

Well, despite my sullen mood, the show must go on.

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><p>"Alright, Heather, move slightly towards your left. Yep, that's right…no, no. A little to your right now…There! Perfect. Don't move."<p>

Heather smiles at Eric and nods her understanding. I watch her, that cute blonde ponytail of hers bobbing up and down. Stop it, Naya. Focus. Focus.

"…after she moves there, okay Naya?"

I blink, unaware of anything that Eric just said.

"Um, sorry. What was that?" I stammer, trying to get my bearings.

"I said that after Heather moves towards the sink, follow her and stand on her right. Got it now?"

I nod and apologize swiftly. Heather eyes me curiously, but doesn't let anyone but me notice. It's crucial we stay in character; Ryan's watching us after all. We can't mess up in front of the head honcho.

"Alright girls, this is good. Real gold we got right here. Make it perfect, okay?"

I fidget. Eric directed the Duets episode from early season two and I remember even back then he fought until the very end to get our "sweet lady kisses" scene perfect. I guess he's got it bad for Brittana.

Well that makes two of us.

All I can remember from that episode is kissing Heather's neck and wanting so badly to kiss her more, going lower and lower and—

"Just make it look like you wanna go down on each other like there's no tomorrow."

Heather laughs. I cough, spluttering on my own saliva. Yeah, Eric. I'll make it look like that. It'll be perhaps the best acting you've ever seen. And why is that? Oh right. Because all I want to do right now is make crazy love to Heather and have her begging me for more.

Sigh.

Wishful thinking never got anyone anywhere.

"Alrighty girls. Are we ready? Here we go. And…action."

The set quiets. The only noise is the breathing of actors, directors, cameramen, and producers alike. I feel like my heart is going to burst out of my chest in about five seconds. I steal a glance at Heather through the mirror of the make shift bathroom and see that she's cool as a cucumber, standing perfectly still and waiting patiently for me to say my line.

"Any day now, Naya," I hear Eric say. Through the mirror, I spot Ryan's fixed gaze. It's gradually becoming curious and I know that if I continue to stand there like a mindless idiot, I'll surely be getting a famous Ryan lecture.

"Listen, Britt-Britt," I start. My voice is gentle, gentler than the normal Santana usually is. She is with Brittany after all, and she tends to be a lot calmer and much more caring when she is.

"I know I've been kind of confusing lately, but you have to know why. I-I think I'm ready."

"For what?" Heather says. She makes the perfect Brittany. Even those two words; they have just the right amount of confusion coupled with just the right dose of bewilderment.

"For us. For us to be together." I can feel my heart pounding harder. Heather moves towards the sink and I follow after her.

"You are?" she asks.

I nod. "Yeah. I've been thinking about it, and all I want is to be with you. I love you, Brittany. I even talked to Kurt.

"You did?" The confusion in her voice sounds so real, I almost believe that I am Santana and she is Brittany.

"Mhm. And it got me thinking. He told me that he's with Blaine because he loves him. He doesn't care if other people are against their relationship. Sure he gets upset when he gets slushied or pushed—why wouldn't he? But he's not going to let some bullies get in his way of being with who he loves."

"Wait. Why would people care if he and Blaine are together?"

I smile, attempting my best to portray Santana's love of Brittany's innocence. It must work, because Eric is staring us down intently, motioning for us to continue.

"Because not everyone is like you. Not everyone can love as much as you. And trust me; no one is as accepting as you are." I give her my best smile. Inside, my heart is breaking over and over but I know I have to push through it.

"That's sweet, Santana. I can't wait to tell Lord Tubbington you said that!" Heather jumps up and down giddily.

"So you understand me?"

"Of course I do. You want to be with me even when we're in school, not just in my room or your room getting our sweet lady kisses on."

"That's right. So…what do you say?"

"Hmm…I think we should try something."

"And what would that be?"

Heather smiles and inches closer. I do, too, and before I know it, our faces are about a centimeter apart. I inhale the sweet pear smell of her shampoo and detect a whiff of strawberry lip gloss smattered on her lips. I look at them. Those perfect lips. She leans in. This is it. We're about to do this. Right here, right now. Millions of people will see this in only a matter of weeks. What if they realize my kiss is a bit too sure? What if they can see through Santana to me? I can't do this. No. I have to. But…

I can't.

I pull away. I back up, horrified, my back hitting the sink. Heather gives me a confused, almost hurt look. Eric begins to yell. Ryan stands stoically, poised, as if deciding what to do with me.

"Cut!" Eric yells. "What the hell was that, Naya?"

I can't do this. It's too much. My heart is going to burst and my brain is going to explode. I know what I have to do. I have to find someone to talk to, someone who'll know what's going on. Dianna, maybe. We talked earlier, maybe she could help. But…no. She's shooting that scene with Lea. Chris! Yes, Chris. He's been through this before, this trying to figure yourself out. But…Chris is still a guy, maybe he wouldn't totally understand.

I've got it.

I turn around and head for the hallway, setting my mind on that one person's trailer.

"Naya! Get back here!" Eric calls crazily. I can see him stomping his way all over set, yelling at people to do something. Ryan just stands there, obviously debating something. And Heather. There she is. She looks so broken, so lost. I never wanted to hurt her, but the truth is, she hurt me first.

With that, I run away. Away from set, away from Heather, away from even me. Yep. I've definitely gone off the edge. All my sanity disappeared the minute I met Heather.

Oh well. I guess this is what they meant by unrequited love. I once argued with my mom about this. I had told her that it wasn't possible; that if one person loved another, then that other must have _some_ feelings for them.

Well you know what? Karma's a bitch.

**Note: There it is! Chapter one. I'm planning to add more, but I'd like to know if you want to read more as well. Please drop a review! Critique, comment, compliment; the whole nine yards folks! Thanks for reading and sorry for all the author's notes. :P**

**Note: One more, I PROMISE. I am currently taking any suggestions for fics. If you have anything you want to read, let me know and I'll be happy to give it a whirl. I've been wanting to get back to writing so I'd gladly take ideas. I write for the Glee and Criminal Minds fandoms and though I'm more comfortable with femslash (Brittana = OTP after all), I will write anything! Er...maybe nothing too 'M' rated, but yeah, basically anything! Alright peeps. Review away!**

**Note: Last note, I really promise this time...Please check out my new forum, The Glee Prompt Forum, which you can find on my profile. Currently there is one challenge up. Check it out! You might have fun!**


	2. An Angel and A Devil

**A/N: You're eyes don't deceive you. I am indeed presenting you with an update. Don't get used to it, though. School starts soon and once it does, my updates will most definitely not be as quick as this. For now, however, enjoy! I wasn't too happy with how this chapter turned out, but here it is. If anyone has ideas for the story or anywhere they want to see it taken, let me know. I'll take your thoughts into consideration for sure. **

**Note: Also! Thanks to all who alerted/favorite this story. It means a lot more than I can say with words. Special thanks goes out to love remains the loudest (my first reviewer!), BriPearson, jack103, Lanter, and my lucky quarter for reviewing!**

**Note: I am currently taking any suggestions for fics. If you have anything you want to read, let me know and I'll be happy to give it a whirl. I've been wanting to get back to writing so I'd gladly take ideas. I write for the Glee and Criminal Minds fandoms and though I'm more comfortable with femslash (Brittana = OTP after all), I will write anything! Er...maybe nothing too 'M' rated, but yeah, basically anything! **

**Note: Please check out my new forum, The Glee Prompt Forum, which you can find on my profile. Currently there is one challenge up. Check it out! You might have fun!**

**Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be. Blah blah blah. Also, the people in this story are real and they won't ever be mine either...that would be a little creepy, owning Naya Rivera. I guess I wouldn't TOTALLY mind it, though... O.o This fic is unbeta'd: any and all mistakes belong to me. **

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><p>"Jane?" I say, stepping into the coolness of her trailer. I silently thank the heavens that our trailers are air-conditioned, for I just ran like a crazy person all the way from set. Smirking to myself as I realize Jane's door doesn't lock either, I gently push it shut, standing alone in the cool, dark space.<p>

"Jane?" I ask again. "You here?"

After a moment or so I sigh, my soul crushed from the fact that I just pulled one of the most dramatic stunts ever on set by running out, and that said stunt was all for naught. Turning to leave, I feel a hand on my shoulder.

"Naya?" I whip myself around, taking in Jane's appearance. Smiling for one of the first times today, I observe her red and white track uniform or, should I say, _Sue's_ red and white track uniform.

"Sorry I didn't hear you; I was listening to some music. I just shot a pretty mean Sue/Will scene. Matt and I nearly tore each other's heads off, we got so into it. Anyways, sometimes I just like to come back and relax, wind down. You know what I mean?"

I nod, knowing exactly what she's talking about. Whenever I have a scene with Dianna or Lea or about anyone else whose name doesn't start with an 'H' and end with an 'eather', the acting gets pretty heated. Santana _is_ the bitch of McKinley after all; all her time on the show is spent either clawing at some character's emotions or analyzing her sexuality with Brittany. Hm. That reminds me.

"Jane," I start, suddenly nervous. I kick the toes of Santana's white Cheerio sneakers into the fraying carpet of her trailer floor. "I, um, I was wondering if I could talk to you about…something, something…personal." I choose my words carefully, not wanting to jump right in and scream "I'm a lesbian" in her face. Why not, you may ask? One: I don't want her to get the wrong idea about anything. Two: I don't want to scare her off or for her to think I've gone completely insane. And, three: I don't even know if I _am_ gay. All I know is that I love Heather, her eyes, her personality, her beautiful hair, those pretty lips—

No. Stop right there. Didn't we already go over this? I can't think like that anymore.

Jane obviously knows something's up; I haven't said anything for a few moments now.

"You can talk to my about anything, Naya, you know that. Although, I must admit, I'm surprised you'd come to me. I thought all of you kids usually talk amongst yourself." This warrants a slight grin on my end; I always love how Jane and Ryan constantly call us 'kids', when in reality we're in our twenties. Even Chris, who practically just legally turned adult, has always been mature enough to pass for thirty. At one point or another, everyone's been convinced he's the wisest of us all.

"I know I can. I just…I kind of needed to talk to you because, well…I think you're relatable to this certain…subject." I swallow a lump that's mysteriously appeared in my throat. A zillion and one questions begin to buzz through my head. Why did I decided to do this _now_? Why couldn't I have waited until after the damn scene? Oh, that's right. Because aforementioned scene involves me kissing Heather's lips off. Ugh. All I want—all I _need_ right now is some sanity, some sort of calmness. I just need to escape. Of course though, I can't do that. We just came back from break. We're only three episodes into season three. No escaping now, Naya. Buck up. Be strong. Stop acting like you're in high school again.

"Well sit down, here," Jane says, switching on the lights. The bulbs slowly flicker on, illuminating the tiny space of her trailer to its maximum. I take a seat on her black, cushiony couch and settle myself in, mentally preparing myself for a difficult discussion.

"So what's this about?" Jane asks once she's comfortable as well.

"Well, it's kind of about me…" I trail off, realizing how self-centered that sounds. "Not in a bad way or anything. I don't mean to sound conceited. I just…it's also about Heather. I didn't know who to talk to. I was going to go to Chris, but I was thinking, I mean to say…he's still a guy and all. And Dianna. I was going to talk to her, but I'm not sure she'd quite understand it, and—"

"Whoa there, calm down." Jane interrupts me, clearly trying to stifle a chuckle under breath. "I have no idea what you're even talking about, Naya. Start from the beginning, hmm?"

I nod slowly. This is it. I'm finally going to tell someone. Suddenly, my brain starts nagging at me. You know those times when there's an angel on one shoulder and a devil on the other? Yeah. That's happening to me. Right now. Angel: _Do it, Naya. This is what you've been waiting for. You know you need to get all of this of your chest, and who better to tell than Jane, someone who went through these things herself? _Devil: _What the hell do you think you're doing, huh? So you're a little confused. So what? You're twenty four years old. You haven't even been alive for that long. You still have a long way to go. Who says you need to figure everything out now anyways?_

Oh shut up. Both of you. Maybe I should take into consideration the 'maybe I'm just going crazy' theory a bit more. But…no. I know what I'm doing. And no matter what comes of this conversation, I have to do it.

"I think…I think I might be gay." I squeeze my eyes shut, wincing at what feels like hours of silence following when, in reality, it's not even five seconds. Opening one eye and peeking out, I see Jane mulling this new revelation over in her head. She doesn't look weirded out—then again, why would she? She doesn't look confused or upset in any way. She doesn't even look surprised. It's almost as if she knew this day was coming, as if she had a hunch that one day, her and I would be sitting on this very black couch talking about these very things.

Odd how things work out sometimes, don't you think?

Finally, Jane replies. What she say, though, shocks me. "Does this have anything to do with Heather?"

I'm stunned, to say the least. How the hell did she know that? Can she read my mind or something? Sure I'm not too subtle about the longing glances and lingering looks I give my blonde best friend, but I didn't think I was announcing it to the world, either.

"H-how did you know that?"

Jane shrugs, her shoulders heaving up and down. "It was a lucky guess."

I give her a pointed look. "I'm gay, not stupid."

"Ah, so you are gay? You're not just thinking about it?"

I stop, momentarily going over this. "Not my point."

"Fine. But just to remind you, I'm gay, too. You don't think I see how you look at her? I went through the same stuff as you, Naya. You don't think I had that one straight friend who I loved but couldn't even perceive the possibility that I could be in love with her? Think again, my friend." She doesn't say it bitterly; she just says it, as if she's trying to get some all important point across.

Point understood, Miss Lynch. I read you, loud and clear.

"So. I have a question for you."

I sigh, shrinking back into the couch and signaling for her to continue by a wave of my hand. All I want to do is stay in this position forever. Sure it's not too great for my back, but who the hell cares anymore? I never thought that ten minutes of conversation like this would have the same draining effect on me that a one hour work out on the tread mill does.

"Are you sure about this? I'm not trying to judge you, obviously, and I certainly understand the hatred towards labels, but are you sure you're not bi?"

Sitting up straighter, I silently decide how to answer. Finally, I speak up, my voice sounding more confident than I'm actually feeling. Well good. I don't want her to think I'm weak.

"I won't deny that the thought has crossed my mind. But then I think of Heather and how perfect she is. It makes me realize that I'll never look at a guy ever the same."

She nods, turning her hands over in her lap. "Have you talked to her about this?"

"Who? Heather? No way. If she finds out the truth, she'll probably just run away and be freaked out that we ever hugged. She'll definitely try to talk to Ryan and write off our scenes together."

"Naya!" she yells disbelievingly. "She's not going to be afraid of you! Even if she doesn't feel the same way, you'll still be her best friend."

"Yeah, yeah, sure. Whatever," I say, casually flinging my hands about in the air. "But still. If I tell her, the only thing that'll result is a broken heart on my end and a guilty self on hers. I don't want her to feel bad that she can't love me back because, knowing her, that's what'll happen. She's too much of a kind person. She'll just feel really terrible knowing that she's the reason I've been having a hard time lately." In a whisper, I add, "I just can't do that to her. I can't break her."

Jane notices the extra comment but decides to ignore it. "Naya, you have to know that Heather isn't the only girl out there. There will be other people. And plus, you're clearly new to all of this, am I correct?"

I hesitate. "If by 'all of this' you mean being a lesbian, then yes." I blush slightly and look down, playing with a loose string of a pillow.

"Then don't focus on Heather right now. Try figuring yourself out first. Learn to accept yourself before you dive into relationships. Everyone goes through heartbreak, Naya, even straight people. Sure, being a woman and loving another woman who won't ever love you back is hard, but everyone goes through this kind of loss. It's not just you." I silently agree with her. Her words aren't threatening, they aren't meant to be mean. They are simply true.

"I'm assuming you came to me because I have similar experiences, not because you wanted to vent to someone about Heather. If you wanted to do that, I bet you'd talk to Dianna. But I can tell that you want someone to relate to, someone who was once in your shoes. I'll tell you this. I can't totally understand what you're going through. When I was younger, the LGBT community was hated in some places. You're lucky, Naya, believe it or not. People are much more accepting today than they were thirty years ago."

I sit silently, taking everything she's just said in, digesting it like it's a food I've never tried before. She's right. Hearing her makes me feel selfish. I know it wasn't her intent to make me feel this way, but everything she said, every last piece of it, is true. How can I not feel selfish? There are people who've had it _way_ harder than me, even way harder than her.

"You're right, Jane. God, I'm so stupid."

"Hey there. Don't think that for one minute. You're not stupid. You're confused. You're upset and, emotionally, a roller coaster. But that doesn't make you stupid. You're just going through a lot of stuff right now. But at one point or another, we all go through stuff."

All I can do in response is laugh. Not belly-laugh material, just a slight chuckle. She's right. She's so right. It scares me sometimes how wise she is. Jane is one of those people who's definitely lived, seen the world.

"Thanks Jane." It's all I can manage to say. It's not a lot, I know, but somehow, she knows I mean it with all my heart.

"You're welcome. Now do me a favor. I have a feeling you're in for a rough next few hours. But don't beat yourself up, okay? You'll learn to accept yourself over time. Just own who you are, Naya. Don't let anyone or anything get in your way."

I mutter a weak okay and, before leaving, give her one of the tightest hugs I've ever given anyone. Thanking her again, I open the door to her trailer, letting the stuffy California air hit my face. Hot days in California can be hell. Closing the door shut behind me, I walk down the stairs slowly, still trying to comprehend all that just happened. I don't get much time to, though, for when I look up, I'm met with Ryan's calm yet scary eyes and Eric's steaming expression.

_Great. Just what I need._

Thinking back to Jane's words though, I finally realize that complaining to myself or anyone for that matter isn't going to get me anywhere. I did run off set, after all. I knew there would be consequences eventually. Following the two men, I drag my feet sullenly along the pavement. But Jane was right. I can't stay depressed forever. I have to let go a little and accept what's coming at me. I perk up, standing straighter and walking taller. This is finally my chance to prove to both Jane and myself that I can do this.

**Note: Thanks again for reading. Please review! And also, please check out my forum. I feel like a complete loser posting this new forum when no one's (except PuCkUrTLoVer06!) even replied in it. SO! Virtual cookies to reviewers and virtual CAKES to people who go check out the forum. Hehehe, I'm a terrible person, bribing you. **


	3. A Much Needed Friend

**A/N: Hi all. Here's chapter 3 for ya. I am actually quite happy how this one turned out so I hope you all will be as well! As always, please review. Your input means the world to me! Thanks to all who alerted/favorited and (again) special shout-out to love remains the loudest, Volerian, BriPearson, and Fhop (who reviewed chapter 1 but I forgot to add into my author's note last chapter! Enjoy everyone!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee. This fic is unbeta'd so any mistakes are mine.**

**Note: Please check out my new forum, The Glee Prompt Forum, which you can find on my profile. Currently there is one challenge up. Check it out! You might have fun!**

"Kevin," I say, approaching my eccentric brown-haired friend. He's dancing around wildly, demonstrating to Cory some funky dance move I've never seen before. I bet Harry has though, or Heather.

Damn it, Naya. Can you try not thinking about her for at least five minutes?

"Naya papaya! Hiya!" He laughs aloud, amused with his rhyming skills. Cory chuckles next to him, taking a seat on one of the many tattered couches that sit outside our choir room set. I roll my eyes at Kevin's lovable awkwardness.

"That's a new one," I say.

Kevin shrugs. "I was eating a mango the other day."

"Oh, well in that case," I say sarcastically.

"What? They're both tropical fruits...I think." Kevin brushes it off with a wave of his hand. I laugh, happy that I decided on asking Kevin and maybe a few others out tonight. All I really need is a break; some free time from Glee, a night away from set, a few alcohol-filled-Heatherless hours. Hopefully those hours can be spent with Kevin. I don't care if anyone else comes, unless it's Heather of course. I just need some time with my Bee. Maybe Cory can tag along, I think to myself as I watch him try to reach under the couch for something without getting off of it. Smiling, I turn to Kevin once again.

"So I was thinking. You, me, and maybe this big guy here," I nod my head towards Cory, who sits up unexpectedly, banging his head on the edge of the couch in the process, "could go out tonight. Maybe get a few drinks, party it up a bit. I don't know about you guys, but I really need to relax."

"Pfttt," Kevin scoffs, "It's only a few weeks in to the new season and you already need a break? What's going on, girl?"

I glare at him, refusing to answer, my gaze remaining solid. He backs up a step and puts his hands up in defense, as if I'm about to go all Santana on him and rip him to shreds. Or maybe throw a slushy in his face.

"Alright, alright. I kind of get what you mean, though. I'm pretty beat myself. Artie and Brittany had some intense scenes earlier today involving Lord Tubbington, the wheelchair, and lots and lots of fondue." He smirks playfully but quickly wipes the grin from his face when he notices my excited expression has fallen. I stay silent for a few moments, in which Cory slaps the sides of his legs quietly, clearly confused, and Kevin seems to ponder something.

"Speaking of Brittany," Kevin starts slowly, "I heard something went down on set today." Deciding to play the part of 'oblivious Naya', I give him an uncertain, sardonic look.

"You'll have to be more specific, Kev, I shot a few scenes today. I was on set more than once."

He sighs, suddenly fidgety, and rubs at the back of his neck out of anxiousness. "Well it's just, uh, Dianna and I were hanging out earlier and Heather really needed to talk to her I guess. She ran up to us all panting and freaking out and stuff. She said something about you running off set...?"

Deciding on telling him the truth—I mean, he is going to find out eventually; nothing stays a secret for too long here on the Glee set—I square my jaw and ready myself. This is what Jane was talking about. I did it with Ryan and Eric earlier and now I have to do it with Kevin and Cory; I need to be honest with myself, and the only way to do that is to be honest with others. Of course, I'm not going to delve too much into the logic of my conversation with Jane. It's not like I'm going to tell the guys of my undying love for Heather. I just mean that I have to be honest...

Then again, maybe I shouldn't.

No. Don't do that. They're your friends. They only want to help you.

Defeated, I answer, Kevin's and Cory's curious eyes boring into me the whole time. "Yes, I did run off set today, alright? It wasn't a big deal or anything, I was just...I just needed some time to calm down about stuff."

"And so you chose the middle of a scene to do it?" Kevin asks pointedly.

I cringe, realizing how bad that sounds aloud. "Yeah...I wasn't thinking straight." Inside my head, a cold laughter sounds when the double meaning of my sentence hits me. "In hindsight, it wasn't the best move I ever made."

"Heather was pretty pissed, you know," Kevin says.

I sigh. I knew she would be. She probably thinks it's something she did. She probably thinks I'm running away for, to her, some unknown reason.

"And it wasn't even all an angry-pissed, although a lot of it was. She was pretty upset, too. And sad; she was crying all over the place. Thank God Dianna was there; I don't think I would have known what to do if she came crying to me. I think overall, though, she was just really confused."

"Yeah, well that makes two of us," I mumble under my breath.

"What was that?" Kevin asks, clearly having heard what I just said.

"Nothing. Forget I said anything, okay? All you guys have to know is that yes, I ran off set but the reason for doing it, besides needing to clear my head, is going to remain unsaid. Stuff has been going on between me and Heather and being with her in that tight closet-like space Ryan calls a bathroom set was driving me insane."

"Fine. But you can't stay mad at her too long.. Heather with no Naya and Naya with no Heather is like…like…like a ham and cheese sandwich without the cheese. Or, uh, or a Thanksgiving dinner without any turkey," Cory says. Kevin nods his head in agreement, letting a loud "right on" escape from his lips.

"Cory. You and Dianna think eerily alike. Do you two always compare things to food?"

I smile. Ignoring my question, Cory continues, "Really though Naya; try and make up with her, okay? If not for yourself and her, then for the show. I'm sure Ryan's gonna flip when he hears."

My smile vanishes. "Yeah, about that…he kind of already has heard…and he kind of already did flip. Don't worry, though," I add reassuringly after seeing Cory's and Kevin's slightly panicked looks, "he didn't threaten to kill me. He did threaten to suspend me, but I told him I was sorry, like, a lot. Eric was pretty mad, too. I don't blame the guy, though. You know how he likes his Brittana." I wince at the mash-up name of mine and Heather's characters. It's true, I'm a huge shipper, as they say, of Brittana, but it hurts so much to think about sometimes, just because I'll never get that damned happy ending like Santana does.

"So what? You're safe for now? What did you even tell Ryan?" Kevin asks, a look of shock and respect crossing his face.

I shrug. "I just told him I've got a lot going on lately of set, you know, in my personal life and stuff. He seemed to buy it."

"Well is that true?" Corey asks.

"Yeah. For the most part. I've been doing a lot of processing lately, however, the processing of what exactly is for me to know and you two to maybe find out at a later date," I add when noticing their curious glance towards me. "And like I said, Heather and I have been having…slight issues, so it's kind of personal even though we work together."

"Understandable." Kevin nods, giving me a clap on the shoulder. "Just do me a favor, Nay. Don't do anything too stupid. Cory's right. You and Heather are best friends. You don't wanna lose that friendship over some fight or argument or whatever the hell's going on with you." Cory nods as well, and I smile, knowing two of my greatest friends are standing in front of me. It's nice to know that you have friends, real friends. It gives you this…I don't know…this feeling a pure joy that just lifts you up through the air until you reach those puffy, inviting looking clouds.

"So!" Cory pipes up after a few moments of quiet. "Are we going out or what, huh? I for one think it would be awesome to take a night off, cool down with a few beers…or maybe more." He winks and Kevin and I burst into fits of giggles.

"Alright fine. I'm in." I pump my fist in the air excitedly at Kevin's acceptance of my invite. "But," he starts, a seriousness hidden behind his always laughing eyes, "we can't get too crazy. I mean, we do have work tomorrow and we don't want what happened to our characters in "Blame it on the Alcohol" to happen to us. We hafta keep up some rep around here." He smiles and I know he's joking around yet totally meaning every word of it. He's right, though. The last thing I need would be to show up to work drunk or mega hung over; I already have one strike from Ryan and I definitely don't need another.

"You're right. We'll keep it PG-13 tonight," I joke lightly. "Feel free to invite anyone, just maybe not Heather…" I drag off and look away, suddenly incredibly interested in a fake tree standing a few feet away. Who ever decided to make plastic plants and put them in baskets anyways? Seems like a waste of plastic to me. If you want a plant, go out and buy a damn plant.

"Totally," Cory says. "Well I got to go. Adam needs to see me about a few things for the next episode and I told him I'd hit the studio after finishing up here. Where should I meet you guys?"

"Depends. We in the mood to go out out or you guys wanna come over to my place? I have plenty of food and drinks from the last time everyone was over. Remember that, Kevin?" He smiles sheepishly, his face turning a slight shade of red. I reflect on the memory myself and laugh aloud.

"Whatever you want. We could avoid endless pictures and autographs if we chill at your place, though," Kevin points out.

"True. Alright, my place it is. You can come over any time after six. I'll be home around then."

"Sweet!" Cory yells. "I gotta go, but see you tonight guys. I may invite Lea and Harry, if that's okay with you Naya."

"Of course. I'm gonna talk to Dianna to see if she wants to come. Just remember, no Heather." The guys nod and with that, Cory's gone.

"I have to run, too, but I'll see you later, okay?" I nod, pulling Kevin into a huge hug. I don't let go for what seems like forever. Kevin's one of the best friends I've ever had, and I love him every day for it. He knows how to comfort a girl, I'll give him that. He doesn't try to flirt with people when they're upset. He doesn't pry, either. He just listens. Sure, he'll throw you the occasional advice, but if it's shot down, he shuts up and goes on listening again. It's times like these when I value every friendship I have, and Kevin's is, at this moment, the one I need the most. I know I should tell him more, maybe tell him why I've been avoiding Heather like she's the black plague, but I know I'm not quite ready yet. When I am, though, he'll be one of the first to know.

When Kevin finally pulls away from me, he grasps my chin in his hand and locks his eyes into mine. "Whatever's going on, you'll get over it. I know you will. You're Naya freaking Rivera, for crying out loud. Got it?"

I nod, smiling and giving him a quick peck on his cheek. He smiles back sweetly and takes off down the hall, giving me a wave good-bye. I pick my bag up off the floor and head in the opposite direction, having parked my car in a different lot than usual today. Hopefully tonight I can just chill out and breathe. I need to drown out everything Heather and focus on other friends for a change. I know drinking away my sorrows isn't the most rational of ideas, but I'll tell you this, it sure helps a hell of a lot.

**Note: I really want to know what you all think of me turning this into Naya/Dianna. I would keep the Heya going as angst, but I don't really want to turn it into romance. I'm open to your suggestions, though, so drop a review! Thanks for reading. :)**


	4. Author's Note

**Author's Note**

Hiya everyone. I know this isn't a new chapter so sorry if you're subscribed to this story and you thought you may get a new chapter. I just wanted to clear some things up before I lost too many readers. I am continuing this fic as Heya, so for all of you who wanted that (the majority of you did), yay! I really hope you continue reading. I also hope that the fact I even thought about making this Nayanna hasn't turned you off from any of my writing!

To my one and only reviewer who actually voted for some Naya/Dianna loving, thank you for your encouragement. So Nocturne in A Minor, if you're reading this, THANK YOU! I am sending you virtual hugs and cookies right now. Thanks for your compliments; they really do mean the world to me. :D Also, I plan on writing a one-shot or maybe more of Nayanna so you (and anyone else-though there don't seem to be many) can get a taste of what you want! Look for that soon!

Disappointed Reader: Just to let you know, I would have re-labeled the story as Quinn and Santana. In the first chapter I had specified that I was starting off with Heya. So it wasn't a total lie. Anyways, I am intending to make a Naya/Dianna friendship, like you said. I hope I haven't lost you as a reader!

Next chapter should be up either tonight or tomorrow (hopefully). I've already started it and I know where it is going. I hope I haven't lost too many readers with all this Nayanna confusion, but rest assured you'll be getting some Heya soon! Thanks for your patience and sorry that all you got from me today was an author's note. :P

One more question: Would you all like a side of Achele or just Heya?


	5. The Party

**A/N: Alright. After an overwhelming response to this fic, I've decided to make Heya endgame. There will be Nayanna friendship scenes (as you may witness in this chapter), but no romance. I'm not even sure I'll make her gay because no one answered my "do you want Achele" question. :( Anyways. I am going to continue with this story how I want it as I've already many ideas in my mind. I know I may lose readers; I think I already have. However, that is okay! I respect your opinions and hope you'll maybe read other fics of mine. Enjoy this chapter and please review! I really want to know how ya'll are going to respond to the Heya decision. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Glee. This story is unbeta'd so all mistakes are mine. **

**jack103: I am so sorry! There won't be any Hemo jealousy...yet. There may or may not be. HOWEVER! Since you and Nocturne in A Minor wanted some Nayanna for Heather to react to, I may 1) include it later on, or 2) write a separate Nayanna story that will either be a one-shot or more, depending on response.**

**Note: My Glee Prompt Forum FAILED ULTIMATELY so I will not keep posting author's notes about it unless I work up more courage to write another challenge. **

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><p>"Dianna, come on in."<p>

"Thanks, Naya."

Letting my blonde friend into my house, I close the door behind her. She looks nice; she's wearing a light blue dress with darker blue polka dots adorning it. Her shoes are simple blue ballet flats and a navy blue headband sits atop her head. I smirk. I guess she was feeling like blue today, hm? Her color choice definitely doesn't describe her mood though; she's looking around, maybe searching for the alcohol, maybe searching for Lea. Those two are inseparable these days. Hell, they've _always_ been inseparable.

"So who's here already?" she asks, kicking her shoes off at the shoe rack by my door.

"Only Kevin so far. Cory's on his way back from the studio, he just had to pick Harry up on his way. He told me he was going to invite Lea but I don't know if she's coming or not." At this, Dianna's happy expression falters the tiniest of bits. I give her a confused look but she just waves me off.

"Okay then…" I say. "So, come on in!"

I lead her into my living room, looking her over once more. Surrounding her headband are a few last hints of pink that tinge the ends of her blonde hair. I laugh internally; all of those 'pink hair scenes' as everyone likes to call them, are going to be what makes Glee the top-most viewed show come its season premiere. The whole cast has had these conversations before; Dianna definitely makes Glee her own. We've never admitted it aloud, but when we read the script for episode one of this season, it was clear she was the shining star in it. And when it came time to shoot the scene itself, she blew it away.

"Hey, Kevin." Kevin gets up the couch and embraces Dianna in a squishy, playful hug, lifting her up off the floor and everything. I swear, that guy may not look like the manliest of all the Glee cast, but he's sure got some muscle.

"Whoa, Kevin, you don't want to break her, do you? I don't think many of the fans would appreciate that." Kevin just shrugs in response and, Dianna still a few inches off the ground, continues squeezing her to death. I laugh; those two have always had the funniest relationship.

The doorbell rings again and I excuse myself, telling the two where the food and drinks are (might as well get an early start on the drinking; I have a feeling there's gonna be a lot of it) and heading for the door.

"Cory!"

"Naya!"

"Harry!"

The three of us laugh at our outbursts and I usher them through the door.

"Kevin and Dianna are in the living room. Well, they're probably in the kitchen by now; I unleashed the secret location of the alcohol." I smirk and Harry laughs. Cory however runs off to the kitchen. This sets me off into a fit of giggles as well and, holding out his arm to link with mine, Harry leads me into the kitchen as well.

"Hey Naya, I thought you had vodka left over from last time," Kevin pouts, cross-eyed. He's looking through the bottles of beer, tequila, shot glasses, and more but failing to find what he's looking for.

I roll my eyes at him. "I finished it a while ago." At this, my friends all give me a funny look. I blush the tiniest of bits but set my glare hard.

"What? I'm allowed to drink, aren't I?" They nod hastily and turn away. I know I've probably shocked them; I'm not the most avid drinker of the cast. Not to say everyone else are alcoholics. They're not, not one bit. We are actors after all; we can't be getting drunk every other party. The only thing about me is that I usually only drink a lot when something big is on my mind. And, in last week's case, Heather was the elephant in the room.

"So you guys didn't invite anyone else?" I reach my hand into a bowl of chips and bring some to my mouth to munch on.

"Nah," Kevin says while trying to pop open a beer, "As long as I got you, I'm good." Dianna fake coos and I swat at her jokingly.

"I invited Mark but he said he couldn't make it. I think he had to do something for his album or something; I don't really know. Lea said she might come but she's obviously not here yet, so who knows what happened to her." Cory brushes it off like it's nothing. Out of the corner of my eye I see Dianna scowl the slightest of bits. I make a mental note to talk to her and turn to Harry.

"Yeah, I invited—" He pauses when the doorbell rings. "Actually, that must be her now!"

My blood freezes for less than a second at the word 'her', but I ignore the feeling and follow Harry to the front door. There's no way he invited _her_. Cory must have told him the rules; anyone _but_ her. There's plenty of other girls he could have invited: Jenna. Amber…My brain starts hurting from the straining I'm making it do. Cory already invited Lea so that checks her off the list…But, no. There must be someone else. Dianna! Dianna's…already here.

Damn it. This could really suck.

Harry opens the door and I see a flip of blonde hair whiz past me.

"Harry!" she squeals and practically jumps into his arms. I can feel the color drain from my face.

"Surprise!" Harry yells over Heather's squeaks of joy. "I wanted to surprise you with your best friend so…ta-da!"

I continue standing there frozen, trying to absorb what's going on around me. Cory, Kevin, and Dianna slowly emerge from the kitchen. Kevin and Dianna looked shocked while Cory peeks his way around the doorframe timidly. I guess he realizes that he forgot to tell Harry the all-important reason tonight was going to be good. He looks scared. I don't blame him.

Heather hops out of Harry's arms and is left standing in front of me. She eyes me suspiciously and I do the same, not having spoken to each other since when I ran off set.

Well. This could be an interesting night.

I look down at everyone, please that at least they're having fun. Kevin, Cory, Harry, and Heather are sitting on the floor, intensely distracted by a game of Monopoly. When Kevin had begged me with those cut Kevin eyes of his to pull the game I never play anymore out from the confines of my storage closet, I had no choice but to agree. He knows how to convince someone, I'll give him that. I had gently refused the offer to play, as had Dianna. Heather and Harry jumped at the thought and Cory had agreed as well.

"Park Place, pleaseee," Kevin slurs, the effects of the alcohol clearly taking a toll on him. He's sitting cross-legged with three shot glasses and an empty beer bottle surrounding him. He's currently gripping another half-empty one in his left hand like he'll die if he lets go.

Cory, the property dealer and banker, begrudgingly hands him the card and takes the money. I guess he wanted that one, too.

I laugh at my friends' craziness and can't help but let my eyes wander to Heather. She really is the prettiest girl I've ever seen. Her blonde hair is thrown up in a messy bun, but it looks so damn cute all the same. She's wearing short jean shorts and a loose-fitted pink t-shirt. It's one of those outfits that was really meant for a relaxing-night-in sort of situation but, when worn on the right girl, makes others swoon anyways.

Wait. No. Stop thinking like that. Ugh. This is why you didn't want her here, Naya, because you knew that you'd be staring at her the whole damn time! What did you and Jane talk about, hm? You have to forget about her, start by working on yourself. You don't need a distraction. You. Have. To. Get. Over. Her.

I silently berate myself and continue the internal war when Dianna, who's been sitting on the opposite side of the couch, scoots closer to me.

"Hey," she starts quietly, as if she doesn't want to scare me.

"Hey yourself," I respond, trying to avoid her semi-concerned gaze and instead taking a long swig of my beer.

"How're you holding up? I know you didn't want Heather here. Don't worry though, I talked to Cory and he definitely knows he's in for it." She laughs lightly. I smile back, but it doesn't reach my eyes. I know she's just trying to cheer me up, but I'm really not in the mood.

"Yeah, Cory's gonna be getting it bad. Maybe I'll have to go all Santana on him so he doesn't make the same mistake again." I smile and Dianna grins hugely.

"There's that smile. I knew I'd be able to make you laugh." I punch her playfully in the arm and she pretends to be knocked out.

"Dianna," I start, knowing I have to do what I'm about to do. Jane was right. Honesty. Being true to yourself. Owning who you are. They're all key things and if I don't tell one of my best friends the truth about me, I might as well go bury myself in a hole and die.

She cocks her head, signaling for me to continue.

"Um, actually, do you think we could go somewhere more private?"

Dianna snorts, looking at the group on the floor. Kevin's in the process of crawling on Cory's back and Heather and Harry are practically humping each other on the floor while trying to fight for each others' drinks.

"You really think any of them are going to hear? They're drunk off their asses."

I nod, agreeing in all entirety. "Still, though, I'd rather we go somewhere quieter."

Dianna looks at me, puzzled as to what could be so important. Realizing my seriousness as well as my sudden nervousness, she follows me into the guest room of my house.

"What's this about?" she asks once we're both settled comfortably on the bed. I'm leaning against the headboard with my knees tucked under my chin and she's sitting at the end with her legs hanging off. She's looking at all the pictures that adorn the dresser. Most of them are of the cast, but I have some of my family, too. There's a few of me with my mom, me with my brother. Others are pictures of all of us, my glee family, making ridiculous faces and a few obscene poses. Most of them, though, are of me and Heather, either snuggled up on one of our beds, laughing together on set, or just staring at each other. I look at the photos too and notice that my looks are much more loving than hers are; all she has in her eyes in that glint of pure friendship. I automatically feel guilty. I've always taken advantage of our close touches but really, it's unfair to her when she has no idea what's going on.

Dianna gets up off the bed to grab a picture of her and Lea, smiling like idiots, during the prom episode. They're all dolled up in their Quinn/Rachel prom attire while standing next to a set of sinks and toilet stalls. Dianna has her hand mere inches from Lea in a fake slap. I remember taking the photo. It was right before I had to go meet Heather and Eric for the 'Santana's going to be an outcast for the rest of her life because she's a lesbian, oh wait, that's not only Santana, that's Naya, too' scene.

"Di?" I speak up, the softness of my voice seeming louder than it is in the tiny room.

She jumps back from the dresser startled and places the picture of her and Lea down quickly, as if it's got some sort of disease on it that she's afraid of catching. She walks back to the bed and takes a seat at the end, crossing her legs and looking at me sincerely.

"So. What did you want to talk about? I hate to assume, but I have a feeling it's something to do with Heather."

I sigh, knowing it's now or never. "Yeah…it is. Listen. I have to tell you something but I need to know you won't tell anyone."

"Naya," she says soothingly, "you know you can talk to me about anything, right? You don't have to worry about me telling anyone anything you don't want them knowing, either. You have my word."

I nod and breathe in, feeling a tightness in my stomach starting to form. I know it'll go away once I tell her; I had this same feeling when I talked to Jane.

"So…um. I'm…" She looks up at me encouragingly, urging me on.

"I'm…gay."

A large grin slowly creeps up her lips. I look at her confused. Why is she smiling?

"And you're in love with Heather, aren't you?" She's smiling devilishly. Did she know this day was coming or something?

"What the hell?" I manage to splutter out. "How the hell did you know that?"

She just shrugs, as if the fact that I'm not only gay but in love with my best friend is one of the most casual things in the world. "It's kind of obvious, I guess."

"I don't understand how people figure this out…I don't think I'm being too obvious…"

"Wait, what was that?"

Shit.

"Um. Nothing."

"Who else have you told?"

I sigh, picking at a fray in the blue comforter that's draped over the guest bed. I didn't really want to tell her about my conversation with Jane, just because, to me, it was private. I'm not exactly in the mood to share my deepest conversations.

"Only Jane, okay? Don't freak out or anything," I add, grumbling.

"Hey," she says, moving up the bed to sit next to me. She leans her head on my shoulder and speaks in nothing more than a whisper. "I'm not going to freak out. I just want what's best for you. If you don't want to talk about it, then that's fine; I'm not pushing. Although I do think it's great that you told someone, especially Jane. I'm sure that was helpful." At this I glare at her and she quickly responds, "Though like I said, I'm not going to intrude."

We sit in silence for a few minutes, the yells and chanting of our friends finding their way down the hall to our ears. I smile and I can feel Dianna doing the same next to me. It's nice just sitting here. It's peaceful. For once I'm forgetting about Heather and focusing on a different friend. Weird. Part of my head feels so empty when thoughts of her aren't coursing through my mind.

"When're you going to tell your parents?" she asks cautiously, interrupting the silence. I moan, that being the _last_ thing I want to think about.

"Listen. No offense Dianna, but I don't really wanna talk right now. I'm kinda just in the mood to relax, you know what I mean? I've had a lot on my mind and all I feel like doing is taking advantage of the peace and quiet—minus Kevin's occasional scream—and just lying here." I don't say it meanly; I don't want her to get the wrong message, after all. I really do appreciate her being her, sitting with me like she is. It's great to know you have a friend to support you.

"I get it. I've got a lot on my mind, too," she counters softly, almost inaudibly. I silently go through a list of things that could be bothering her but can't think of any. She's always seemed like the perfect person; blonde, pretty, talented. What could she possibly be worrying about?

**Note: Please review! And also, does anyone want to see Achele?**


	6. Secrets Revealed

**A/N: Longer chapter for ya'll! Thanks to all my alerters and favoriters and also to Nocturne in A Minor, SGAFirenity, and Dxxx for reviewing! :) Your input and complements make me so happy! With that being said, please enjoy and review!**

**Nocturne in A Minor: Yes you are still reading! And I thank you muchly for that! Don't worry. Hemo jealousy will be on its way shortly. ;)**

**SGAFirenity: Achele is in but I am taking what you said into account. There will definitely be more focus on Heya as this is a Heya fic. Thanks for reviewing!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee. This fic is unbeta'd so any mistakes are mine.**

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><p>Two weeks. Two weeks since I've had a semi-real conversation with Heather. Two weeks since I had my talk with Jane. Two weeks since I relished in the peacefulness of Dianna's comfort. Two weeks also since Dianna alluded to something more. Two weeks that I've been floating by, shooting scene after scene with little to no complaints. I've kept my mouth shut; haven't run off set since that incident which now seems like months ago. I've been good. I've listened to Ryan's strict direction to not combine my personal life with my work. I've listened to every last detail Eric's thrown at me for making every damn Brittana scene the top-notch quality it can be.<p>

Let me explain. First on the agenda, Heather. Sure, we've talked and all; polite 'hi's and 'bye's walking down the hallways, after scenes, in hair and makeup. I can't shut her out completely. We do work together after all. Trying to permanently erase her from my life would be nearly impossible, especially with the scenes we've been doing. After shooting them though, I just excuse myself, whispering something about needing to head to the studio or lunch with a friend. Lies. All lies. Heather no doubt knows my recording schedule—everyone knows everyone's schedules around here—and who would I have lunch with that's outside of the Glee cast? All my other friends have moved away. The only people I've talked to in the last year—aside from my brother, mom, and dad—are Glee-related, minus the occasional tweet and e-mail message of course.

So yes. I shut her out. I try to avoid her as much as possible. I pretend that I'm doing the right thing by leaving her standing alone after a scene or dance rehearsal (in which, by the way, she rocks). I painfully ignore her looks of hurt and confusion when I walk away. Part of me thinks it really is the best thing for both her and me. When I'm lying in bed at night, all my mind can do is stray to her and the fact that, once I'm over her, we can become best friends, reattaching ourselves at the hip like we never said goodbye. It's hard, though, because another part of me screams that I'm being selfish, that Heather at least deserves an explanation for my odd behavior. But…no. That would mean coming out to her and I'm just not ready. I'm only starting to accept myself and the fact that Jane and Dianna know. Adding another to the pot of insiders? No. It just can't be done yet.

And that brings me to Dianna. That mental note I made to remind myself to talk to her? It's gone. It disappeared almost immediately when I realized that I don't want to push her. If she really wanted to tell me what's been on her mind, she would. She has no trust issues with me whatsoever. If she had a secret to tell, I'd definitely be the first person she'd come to…aside from maybe Lea. Or not. As of late, it seems that she's been avoiding Lea the way I've been avoiding Heather: like she has some deadly disease that will kill her at the simplest of touches.

Why Dianna's avoiding her, though? I have no idea. I hate prying and so I'm not going to. I shouldn't even be thinking about any of this because if anyone knows about keeping in secrets, it's me. If anyone should know about only revealing covert news when the person revealing it is ready for it themselves, it's me. So no. I can't push Dianna into talking about anything she doesn't want to. Plus, we've grown so much closer in the last couple weeks. We've had lunch dates, movie nights, spa visits…all the things I used to do with Heather and she with Lea.

Now, despite the lack of Heather and the constantly gnawingly empty feeling in my heart, I'm actually quite content with life. Glee's always such a good distraction, even though the girl I'm trying to be distracted of is there. It doesn't matter that she is though, because I have so many other friends to keep me busy. Dianna, as I've said, is one of the most precious people in my life at the moment. Kevin, him too of course. We've always been close and, even though I haven't told him anything official yet, I think he has this sense that something's been going in with me. I'm pretty sure he knows it has something to do with Heather, too, but I'm not going to bring it up. Right now, all I want to do is act, sing, dance, and treasure every friendship I have like it's my last. Well. Except for Heather's.

OoOoOoOo

"Naya!" I turn around, scanning the thick crowds of extras, lighting managers, producers, and actors for the one who called my name. Finally my eyes land on Dianna, who's weaving her way furiously through the mob.

"Naya," she pants when successfully making her way to me. I smirk, taking in her disheveled state and the light sheen of sweat glistening on her flawless skin.

"What?" I joke. "Did you run all the way from your house or something?"

She just rolls her eyes, but answers me seriously. "Actually, I ran all the way from my trailer, which I may as well call my temporary home due to all the work we've had lately."

I nod in agreement, muttering, "True dat."

Dianna giggles at my attempt to sound semi-gangster and continues. "So, I was thinking. You know the premiere for episode one is coming up. How about everyone comes over to my place to watch it?"

Opening my mouth to offer my house, she cuts me off. "I know you said you'd have everyone over at your house, but we were there a couple weeks ago and I feel bad. None of us have done anything together as a group. It's just been you and me and occasionally Kevin. I don't even think I've had a real conversation with Mark, Amber, or Heather in what feels like forever." She stops short, noticing my wince at her mention of Heather.

"Oops…" she mutters, reaching out to rub my shoulder apologetically. "Sorry. I keep forgetting it's still a sore subject. You haven't really brought her up in a while so it kind of slipped my mind…"

I wave her off, wanting all Heather-talk to disappear; I'm finally beginning the long and difficult process of moving on and I want to keep it that way.

"It's fine. But really, Di, I don't mind having everyone over. Plus, the 'party', if you can even call it that, was basically just Kevin, Cory, Harry, and…her, getting drunk and throwing plastic houses and fake money at each other. Does that even count?"

She just shrugs, clearly seeing my point. "Fine, fine. Whatever. But still. There's no arguing this. I'm having it at my house and that's that. And I didn't tell you so you could argue with me. I wanted to let you know in advanced so you and Jenna can come over and help me out with setting up and stuff. I'm off to find her when I'm done here; I think she mentioned a scene with Kevin but I don't know exactly when that is…or was…" She frowns, warranting a laugh from my side.

"I love you, Dianna, you know that?" She playfully gasps in response, feigning surprise.

"I had _no_ idea. Anyways, so are you in?" she asks eagerly. Pretending to give deep thought to the matter, I finally answer after a shockingly hard punch to my arm.

"Alright, alright! You've successfully roped me in. Happy now?" I ask and stick my tongue out at her.

"Quite. Now, if you'd excuse me, I'm off to find Jenna. Though I may be wandering for a little while. This episode we're doing has got way too many people here for my liking, at least for the time being."

I nod in agreement. The episode Ryan, Ian, and Brad have got us filming has created a need for more than three hundred extras of all kinds: singers, dancers, actors; even five year old kids. I don't even know where they found them all. Well, then again, it _is _California. Everyone and anyone are looking for their fatefully lucky chance at stardom. Anyways, this being the case, finding one person in the crowds of many has proved to be quite difficult in the past few days.

"Okay. I'll see you in a few."

Dianna throws me a confused, panicked glance.

"Dance rehearsal, remember? We've got to put these three hundred or so people to work _somehow_." And work it will be. I'm sure Zach's thought up some crazy way to choreograph for so many.

"Oh! Right! Okay, see you then." With that, she's gone. I chuckle at her busyness; she's had so much on her plate recently, she can't even remember her own schedule.

Walking away from the mass of extras, I work my way to the doors leading outside. Darren, Cory, Harry, and Max are all playing a game of basketball. It's something they've done on more than one occasion. We're usually here for at least ten hours a day, usually more, and so it's a fun way for the guys to relax. I've joined in a couple of times, but I have to admit, they get really in to it. By and large, I just sit with Chris on the imaginary sidelines and cheer everyone on. It's much more fun than having to worry about getting all sweaty or scraping a knee. We _do_ like keeping our creators happy after all, and having to explain to Ryan the source of skinned elbows or bruised shins isn't exactly what I'd call a fun time.

Deciding to ignore the makeshift basketball court for today, I instead turn towards the direction of trailers, all of them bunched up in a uniform manner on the Paramount pavement. As I'm readying myself to turn into mine, I spot Lea out of the corner of my eye. I freeze, contemplating my options. I know I shouldn't pry; it wouldn't be fair to Dianna to talk to Lea about what's been going on between them when 1) I don't even know if there _is_ anything going on between them and 2) I haven't talked to Dianna about it.

_God, if Dianna finds out what I'm about to do happened, she is going to murder me._

Despite this thought coursing its way through my mind like a swarm of angry bees, I go against my better judgment and scurry my way across the lot to Lea. I don't want to risk myself getting caught by Dianna. Stopping at the bottom of Lea's trailer steps, I hiss at her, signaling for her to turn around.

"Psst, Lea."

Surprised, she whips around, nearly tumbling off the stairs in the process.

"Whoa there," I warn, grabbing her arm to help her catch her balance. "Careful."

"Thanks," she gushes gratefully. I steady her and follow inside as she beckons me in. I've always loved her trailer. I don't spend too much time in here, just because I'm usually with Heather…rather, I _used_ to spend nearly any free time I had on set either in her trailer or glued to her side, wandering about. Of course, things are different now. But like I was saying before I got distracted by blonde-haired, fair-skinned, sexy as hell perfectness—God dammit, stop thinking like that, Naya!—Lea's trailer is quite nice. She's always spraying this apple-vanilla spritz through the air. Between that wafting through the tiny atmosphere and the inviting posters and comfy pillows she's got scattered through the room, it's no wonder Dianna used to hang out in here with her 24/7.

Oh. Right. Dianna. I should probably say something. Dianna's the whole reason I approached Lea in the first place.

"So," I start, taking a seat on the couch she's gesturing to.

"Yes?" my shorter friend asks, slowly becoming confused at my constant fidgeting to get comfortable and my lack of eye contact.

"Um…how are you?" I finally ask, lost on what to say. I don't want to dive right in to the whole Dianna drama (if it even is drama) quite yet. Let her get warmed up to me first. Apparently though, my question is having the opposite effect on her, as she's now staring at my in complete bewilderment.

"I'm fine, Naya…but I highly doubt that you came to me just to see how I am."

"Yeah…well I was just wondering if there's anything going on with you…and, er, Dianna…" I leave my question open, practically voicing it as a statement in hopes to not get her too riled up. I want to keep things civil. Like I said, I don't want her to go blabbing to our certain blonde friend. That could cost me a much-needed-at-the-moment friendship.

She pauses, her hand mid-way to brushing a strand of hair out of her eyes. As if she's trying to keep her cool though, she whisks the hair away and asks as calmly as possible, "Why do you say that?"

"I—"

"Wait…she hasn't said anything to you, has she?" she asks suddenly worried.

"No! No, not at all. It's just…well, I've been hanging out with her a lot recently and whenever you came up in conversation," she glares questioningly and I add, "not that she's bringing you up or anything. You usually just end up in our discussions because we're talking about work." She nods hesitantly and urges me to continue. I shrug. "That's it I guess. I just wanted to make sure everything was okay. I can't have two of my favorite girls mad at each other, after all!" I joke playfully. Unbeknownst to her however, I mean every word of it. That day when Dianna compared Heather and me to a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, well this is the case in which I'd be using that exact same metaphor to describe Dianna and Lea's friendship. They're inseparable, or at least they're supposed to be.

"But what has she said?" Lea demands.

"Nothing! She's just been acting strange, that's all. Whenever someone mentions your name she tenses up or acts all uncomfortable. Listen, it's not a big deal. Like I said, I just wanted to make sure everything's alright with you two."

"It's not really any of your business," she mumbles under her breath. I sigh; this is what I was afraid of.

"I know that, Lea. And I know I shouldn't have pried. It's just, well…Dianna and I have gotten really close lately and I care about her. I don't want anything to happen to her." I cringe after realizing how bad that sounds.

"Well gee. Thanks, Naya. Just assume everything's my fault, huh?" she spits out, an invisible venom pouring out of her mouth, nose, ears, and eyes.

"I, er, that came out wrong, Lea. I care about you, too, you know. I don't want anything Dianna's doing to hurt you, either."

"Sure," she clucks both in anger and uncertainness. "You're only saying that because you feel bad." My shorter friend fumes for a few seconds, as if trying to fully absorb our conversation. "When did you and Dianna become such good friends anyways?"

This question catches me off guard. There's obviously a reason. I know it and she probably knows something big happened to bring us closer than before. But I'm not exactly in the mood to tell Lea my deepest secret; if I tell anyone next it'd be Kevin, not even her. She's a bit of a ways down the list. But still…I want her to know the truth; that I'm not trying to stir up any trouble between my blonde and brunette friends. I know what I have to do. Dammit, Lea. You better be satisfied after I tell you this.

"Lea," I say, an unknown boost of confidence swelling within me and taking over. Maybe it's a good idea I'm telling her. It seems the more people I tell the more comfortable I'm becoming. "I'm gay."

She halts, her mouth halfway open. Her finger is pointed in the air as if she's about to tell me off for stealing her best-friendship away for no good reason. I guess I pushed _that_ idea out of her mind.

"I-I'm sorry?" Lea finally manages to stammer.

"Um. No offense, but I'm not really in the mood to repeat it. But I think you heard me," I say in a teasing voice.

"Uh…yeah. Okay then…so. Really, huh? Wow." I give her a quizzical look and she her expression quickly morphs into one of shame. "Oh my God! I am so sorry, Naya. That's probably not exactly what you wanted to hear. I'm just…surprised is all. But hey. I'm perfectly fine with that. And thank you so much for telling me; I'm assuming it's been on the forefront of your mind lately. You've been kind of…off."

Choosing to ignore that last part, I ask her about the matter at hand. "So are we good, Lea? This is the reason why Dianna and I have become closer. She's just been helping me through stuff, you know?"

"Yeah, yeah. Of course. I get it. Um…" she starts, looking away from me and taking a sudden interest in a cabinet on the opposite side of the trailer. "You and Dianna…I mean. You're just…friends, right? She's just helping you as a friend...?"

What the hell is she talking about?

"I'm sorry?"

She continues staring distractedly away from me, this time eyeing a clock. "You heard me."

"Should I be confused by this question? Because…I am."

"Just answer me, please," she moans. I've never seen her act so defeated before.

"Okay, okay. Well yes, we're just friends. Why would you even suggest something more?"

"No reason," Lea sputters bitingly. Her head snaps up and her eyes are boring into mine. My God, I am so freaking confused right now. "I'm simply looking out for your you, Naya. I don't want you to get any ideas that you can be with Dianna or something…" She looks away, half-embarrassed and half jealous-sounding. Odd.

"Ha ha, relax Lea. I'm not falling for Dianna. She's as straight as they come."

"Hehe, yeah…" she counters, clearly trying to hide some known fact between Lea and Dianna. Am I missing something here? "But hey," she says quickly, perhaps in attempts to cover her moments of what seems to me to be insanity, "Don't be knocking my thoughts down so quickly, Miss Rivera. I wouldn't be laughing at the idea of falling for a friend, if I were you."

Oh shit. Does she know, too? How the hell does everyone seem to be aware of my ridiculous crush on Heather?

"The way you and Heather hang out all the time would definitely lead people to question your motives!" I freeze, my blood running cold, but unfreeze when I notice Lea's high-pitched, giggly laughter. She's joking. Oh. _Oh._ Phew. That was a close one. I emit a weak chuckle as to not allow her to catch on to the absolute truth of her statement. Playfully nudging her shoulder, I speak up.

"I'm going to get you one day for saying things like that." Then, for added certainness and a thought of 'better to be safe than sorry' running through my mind, I say, "Like I could really be in love with my best friend!" I laugh a little too loudly and hope she can't see through the faults.

"Well now that I'm thinking about it, I'm not really surprised to find out you're gay!" Lea looks towards me for an assurance that it's okay to talk about it. I nod slowly yet smile. I really should be more open about it; that's the only way I'm going to ever learn to accept myself.

"You've never really had a boyfriend, at least for the time I've known you. And when you dated Mark you never seemed too into it. If you ask me, it seemed more like a brother-being-protective-of-his-little-sister kind of relationship." I roll my eyes but agree. She's got a point there. I never really breeched Mark about the whole thing after we broke up, so I don't know exactly what he was thinking, but I know that all I really felt was a strong friendship. Makes sense, though. We started going out around the time I started falling for Heather, so I'm assuming I was unconsciously using him as a way to deny my true self.

"Well I guess it all makes sense now, huh?" I ask her, scooting over on the couch so she can squeeze next to me.

"Definitely," she affirms. "I can't say I would have pegged you as a lesbian but everything fits now!" She squeals like I little child getting candy. I start to laugh; I'll never fully understand Lea. She's always so happy and caring. Aside from the incident only moments ago concerning her and our blonde friend (I really have to talk to Dianna about that), we've never argued, not once. I start tickling her and joke along.

"That's right. And now…beware! The lesbian's going to attack you!" I pounce on her and start tickling her ribs like mad. A creaking door sounds in my ears and I whip around to see where it came from. Heather's standing in the doorway, her blonde hair being blown about wildly by a California wind that's picked up outside. I swallow thickly and jump off of Lea, who quickly scurries off of me and stands up.

"Heather!" she says, breaking the awkward silence. Her voice is uncertain and slightly panty; I only assume she's trying to come up with some way to explain to her why we were yelling out 'lesbian' like it was nobody's business. By my shocked and unmoving spot on the couch, I'm sure Lea's realized that I don't want anyone else knowing.

"What did you just say to her, Naya?"

I can't talk; my mouth won't open. It feels as if it's been closed shut permanently by some super-super-super-super-super glue.

"Nothing. She didn't say anything, Heather. We were just…playing a game, that's all," Lea responds quickly and winces. It's a lame excuse and she knows it.

"A-are you gay?" my best friend asks, evidently ignoring Lea's rushed justification. I know I can't deny it; she'll find out eventually. Even if I don't tell her now, I'm going to tell her someday and if I lie about it now and tell her I really am gay later on, that'll only make matters worse. I know what I have to do. I may not be happy about. I may have wanted to wait a few more days, weeks, months, years, but it's now or never. I'm not about to risk our friendship. Plus, maybe fate intervened at the perfect time. Maybe the world is sending me signals that I'm _supposed_ to tell Heather. Maybe all of this was some long-term plan some mysterious force has been planning for years and years.

"Yes," I finally answer after what feels like forever. Lea whimpers a few feet away from me and out of the corner of my eye I notice her hung head. She must feel bad, as if she somehow blames herself for this. I'll have to remember to talk to her later and reassure her that that's not the case at all. I could have called this whole thing off. I could have denied it. But instead, I'm facing it. God I hope Heather doesn't hate me.

"Heather?" I ask questioningly as she hasn't said anything for quite some time now. "Uh. You okay there?" I'm sure she is. I mean, what kind of person would she be if she didn't accept this? I'm still her best friend. She's not homophobic; she works on Glee after all. But if she's not, then why is she running away?

"Heather!" I yell at her, realizing she's bolted from the door faster than one could say 'Rachel Berry'. "Where the hell are you going?"

But she doesn't answer me. Instead, she's sprinting faster than I've ever seen her go.

Oh.

My.

God.

What the hell did I just do?

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><p><strong>Note: I know author's notes can be annoying but I wanted to take time to thank cloogle, the author of 'Happy Agony'. If you haven't read it, you should; it's over in the Faberry fandom. The reason I tried my hand at RPF in the first place is because of cloogle's amazing writing. She writes Dianna and Lea so well and, though I know I have a different style and a different take on their voices, I hope I am embodying them to somewhat of an appropriate extent. So...she's probably not reading this but by the slim chance that she is, thanks goes to cloogle, who has been my biggest inspiration for this story yet!<strong>


	7. Lea Say What?

**A/N: Thank you to all those who favorited and alerted. Special thanks to BriPearson, rawrrr93, Torchica, and SGA Firenity for reviewing. I love input and greatly appreciate it. If you'd please, send me a PM or review when you're done reading. Reviews really make my day and give me more motive to write. **

**Disclaimer: Glee is not mine. This story is unbeta'd so any mistakes belong to me. **

**SGA Firenity: Thank you so much for your review! It really helped me write this chapter. Your predictions were halfway correct and may be even more correct in the near future. ;)**

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><p>"Hello! Welcome to my humble home! Come in, come in," Dianna says, mimicking a voice that of a rich man's. She begins to curtsy but changes it into a bow mid-curtsy.<p>

"This," she starts in a boomingly fake voice, "is the grand foyer. Down the hall to the right is where the servants sleep and the door past that is the main bathroom adorned with golden toilets, sinks, and mirrors. On the right is my office and next to that, the kitchen, complete with a Panini maker, chocolate fondue fountain, and soda machine. May I get you anything?"

I laugh and swat at her playfully. "Yeah, be a gem and give this to one of your servants." I throw my coat at her and she stumbles to catch it.

"Fine," she huffs, clearly determined to keep the charade up. "Oh Cory!" Cory's tall, gangly body tumbles through the hall leading from Dianna's living room.

"This preposterous woman wants you to hang this up. And when you're done with that, please fetch her a glass of our finest red wines."

"Uh…" he says. When receiving a glare from his hostess however, he stands up straight and mock salutes. "YES SIR!" With that he's off, tearing through what actually is quite a small house to Dianna's coat closet which, quite inconveniently, is a ways down from the front door.

"So Di, you gonna keep this up all night?" I ask her. She opens her mouth as if she's about to announce a royal decree but shrugs her shoulders instead.

"Nah, I s'pose not. It was fun while it lasted, though!"

I laugh. "Yes, I'm sure it was. It was certainly entertaining, I'll give you that." Winking at her, I continue, "So, who all is here already?"

Leading me into her living room, she talks as we walk. "Harry, Jenna, Amber, Chris, you saw Cory…yeah. That's it so far. Kevin and Mark were driving together; Kevin just had to pick Mark up from the studio so they should be here soon. Ashley couldn't make it and…" she clears her throat awkwardly, "I'm not sure about Lea or Heather."

I tense; as of late, hearing Heather's name, or even Lea's, has gotten me all shaky. I haven't talked to Heather in a couple weeks, not even a 'hello' or 'nice weather we're having today' here or there. If I see her walking by my trailer or dancing in the parking lot with Harry, I glide right by, intent on avoiding even eye contact. I know it's mean, but honestly, I think I have reason to ignore her.

The only time since that fateful incident that I've talked to 'her' is when Santana's talking to Brittany. I can't do much about anything when it comes to our job. I just plaster on a smile (or frown, whatever Santana's feeling that particular day) and slowly inch myself through the scene. I know it won't be any better if I try and talk to Ryan about writing off the Brittana storyline; that'll only cause uproar amongst fans and prompt Ryan to indulge in my personal life, NOT something I'm screaming for a chance to happen.

As much as I'm trying to delete her from my mind, part of me wants to go up to her and ask what she's thinking, how she's coping. Obviously something big happened between us, and I don't want the fact that she found out about my sexuality because of a tickle session with Lea instead of me actually confronting her about it to ruin our friendship.

Then again, I guess it already kind of has.

And then there's Lea. Sweet Lea, who, until that day in her trailer, I thought I could trust. Don't get me wrong, it's not exactly that I don't trust her, it's just hard confiding in her because of what happened. I'm pretty sure she feels guilty, even though I reassured her time and time again that nothing was her fault. But after a few days of awkward hanging out and me trying to pry into that pretty head of hers to find out what's been running through it—obviously something has been; Dianna is now not the only one avoiding someone, Lea's avoiding her too, running away at the slightest glances of blondish pink hair—I gave up. I suppose she did as well, for Lea hasn't made any effort to do anything with me.

I'll admit, I've been kind of lonely. And it sucks. No Heather has been taking a huge toll on me; we used to do everything together. We'd make time for each other, even if it was inconvenient. Now though, I've been putting all the work I used to put in to make plans with her into scurrying away the second I see her. I'm pretty sure the whole thing's got me pretty messed up in the head. I can hardly sleep anymore because I'm too busy tossing and turning, part of myself feeling guilty for not spending time with her while another half of me constantly wracks my brain for the reason she ran away that day. Due to the lack of sleep, heavy bags have often painted themselves under my eyes and I'm almost positive my step hasn't been as happy and bouncy as it once was. Thank God for makeup.

The only good thing that's come out of the last couple months is that between everything that's happened to me and everything that seems to be happening to her, Dianna and I have gotten much closer. Like practically best-friend worthy. We're not quite at the level, the only reason being that I still, deep down, consider Heather to be my best friend. I do think that we'll work through all the crap one day, so I can't let go of her that easily. And plus, Dianna probably thinks the same about Lea.

The doorbell rings, snapping me back to the present.

"Here, I'll go get that. Be right back, Naya. Make yourself comfortable!" Dianna flits away to the front door as Cory saunters his way back into the room. He comes up behind me and lifts me up off the ground, swinging me about like I'm as light as a feather.

"Cory!" I squeak. "Put me down!"

"Nuh-uh," he says goofily. "You made me put your coat away. This is what you get."

"Well of course you had to put it away for my; you're Dianna's servant after all." I smirk playfully and stick my tongue out at him. With this, he throws me onto the couch, narrowly avoiding Harry and Jenna who are currently engaged in what seems to be a heated discussion about the upcoming episode we'll be starting to film soon. Our read-through revealed a feisty Tina Cohen-Chang Chang scene that revolves around Tina meeting Mike's parents. It seems to be a good one and, of course, Jenna couldn't be happier with the fact that she'll actually be getting a storyline.

"Cory!" Jenna and I yell at the same time. "Thanks for almost crushing me," she says jokingly but to who, I'm unsure.

"It wasn't me, it was him," I respond in cautious defense.

"Fine. But just in case you decide to throw Chris on me next," she says, reprimanding Cory with a voice that sounds like she's mothering a young child, "I'm going to sit next to Amber."

Cory just shrugs in response and lopes off in search of Chris, perhaps to turn Jenna's witty statement true.

"Hey, Naya, how're you doing tonight?" Harry asks when Cory's gone and Jenna's sitting a safe distance across the room.

"I'm alright. How are you, Harry?"

"Pretty good. Kinda tired. I don't know if you heard, but Heather and I have this awesome mega pretty difficult yet totally sweet dance routine we've been working on. Zach's really testing us on this one, but I don't mind. You should come watch us when we film it. We're gonna kick some serious ass."

I smile at Harry's genuineness. He's never one to brag so what he's saying must be completely and utterly true. I have no doubt, what with him and Heather at the wheel.

Oh shit. Heather. Here come the thoughts.

Noticing my grin slide, Harry wrinkles his face in worry and concern.

"Can I ask you something?"

I shrug my shoulders, indicating he should continue.

"What is with you and Heather lately?" I open my mouth to respond but he cuts me off. "Don't try to deny anything, Naya. She and I have shot a couple scenes together and dance rehearsal takes up almost our entire day. Yet not once has she said anything about you. It's freaking me out. Only like a few weeks ago or something all she talked about was Naya this, Naya that. I could hardly get anything I wanted to say in."

I don't answer for a few moments, digesting this new information like it's a food I've never tried before. Heather's not talking about me anymore? Is this good? I don't really know. On one hand, it could show that she really doesn't care about me being gay. But that can't be it because if she doesn't, then, one, she wouldn't have run off and two, she would've come and talked to me by now. The other option is that for some weird reason she does care. She's either too disgusted or freaked out—highly unlikely in my opinion—or she's hesitant about something. But what that something is, I don't know. That's what I need to find out. Maybe I should ask Harry. He just said he's with her practically the whole day after all. I'm sure I could think of a clever way for him to sneak in a bit of conversation filler about me. But…no. I can't. It wouldn't be right. If anyone has to address Heather about this, it's me. Ugh. Why do I have to be so damn scared and weak?

"Also, Naya," he starts, his usually confident voice dimmed to one of tentativeness, "I, um, I wanted to say sorry."

This throws me for a curve. "Sorry? About what?"

"You know…when we were at your house a couple weeks ago…the party. Monopoly. Getting drunk. Well, some of us were getting drunk. You and Dianna disappeared after I dominated the greens and started on my fourth beer."

"Oh…right. That party," I answer, dumfounded. What's he even apologizing for?

Realizing I've said that aloud, he continues. "Because I invited Heather."

Oh. Right. That.

"Dianna talked to me the next day about things being tense or something like that. And Cory had told me later that night that I wasn't supposed to invite her, that it was an any and all Glee cast party minus Heather."

"Yeah…it was. But hey, no hard feelings, okay?" I really don't want Harry feeling bad about anything. I know his intentions were never to hurt me, he didn't even know of the no-Heather rule.

"Still though, I wanted to say sorry. That's been nagging me for a while now but I haven't found the time to apologize."

"Well I appreciate it Harry, but really, it's fine." I smile at him, wanting for this conversation to be over. Sure, it's nice that he's apologizing and everything and that he seems to care about my mysterious-to-the-outside-world relationship with our blonde friend, but thinking about her makes this one part of me hurt so damn bad.

"So…if it's 'fine', does that mean you and Heather are back on speaking terms?"

"I—wait. I never said we weren't speaking."

He shuffles nervously on the couch. "True, true. But, well, I just assumed…I mean. She hasn't talked about you. You haven't talked about her. There's clearly something going on, everyone's noticed it. I just figured you guys weren't really spending time with each other or talking anymore. Sorry if I assumed wrong," he adds quickly. His desire for me not to get mad amuses me and a hardly-there smile grows and falls on my lips.

"It's alright, I get where you're coming from. In answer to your question, though, we're not exactly talking…"

"Not exactly?"

"Um. Like not at all."

"Ah…" he says, looking away as if pondering something.

"Hold up," I start, his previous words finally sinking in, "Did you say that everyone's noticed that Heather and I aren't talking?"

He pauses, as if trying to decide to lie or tell the truth. He better not lie. I guess he figures I'll call him out on it however, for his reply is quick to be answered.

"Yeah, yeah, I did. But I mean, they're not like making a big deal out of it or anything. It's just that everyone's kind of noticed something going on with you and it just so happens Heather's not by your side…or anywhere you are, even if it's in the same room."

I consider this and go to respond, but three pairs of feet interrupt my thoughts as they walk into the living room.

"Ummm, here we are," I hear Dianna say, her voice wavering. Wanting to know the source of the un-sureness in her usually sure tone, I look up at her.

Oh.

I see now.

Lea and Heather are flanking her left and right, respectively. Well that's gotta be awkward.

"Soooo…yeah. Welcome!" she yells a bit too enthusiastically. "Food and drinks are in the kitchen. Kevin and Mark are on their way and Ashley couldn't make it so…enjoy." She quickly heads off down the hall, murmuring something about needing to use the bathroom. I stand up quickly, silently apologizing to Harry for my abrupt leave with me eyes. He nods in understanding and gets up to move towards the others, Cory's arms holding a tightly secured Chris around the waist threateningly above Jenna's tiny frame. I laugh to myself. I love my friends.

I scurry off in hopes of catching Dianna before she undoubtedly locks herself in the bathroom and starts panicking or crying when Heather steps in front of me.

"Heather," I say, jumping back slightly. I was definitely not expecting her to approach me for a while, if ever, and certainly not tonight. I figured she'd at least want to talk to me when no one else was around.

"Hey…listen, we really need to talk."

Lea stands behind her watching our exchange with a keen interest. What's she got up her sleeve?

I eye Heather suspiciously and, when opening my mouth, I instead direct a question towards the small brunette hiding behind us. "Lea? Are you listening in on our conversation right now?" I try to keep my voice calm, but unfortunately it sounds a bit harsh.

"W-what?" she asks in a fake puzzlement, making her way around Heather's body to stand before us both. "No. I was just, um, I was just gonna say hi to you, Naya. So, uh, hi."

"Right…" She really can be a terrible liar sometimes.

"Okay, well I'm gonna get a drink, so…" She heads off in the direction of the kitchen, squeezing Heather's arm on the way out. Was that a squeeze of support? Have these two been conspiring against my back? Damn it, Lea. That's the last thing I wanted. I told her I'm gay because I thought I could trust her, but if she's been talking to Heather about it then I'm seriously going to punch someone.

As Lea's leaving, she looks longingly down the hall where Dianna ran through, but at the last second turns in the opposite direction. My God, what the hell is with those two lately?

"Can we talk now?" Heather pipes up once Lea's rounded the corner, her voice raising the slightest of bits with anxiousness and, is that anger?

"I—Heather…" I so do not want to have this conversation right now. I came to Dianna's tonight to have fun. I didn't sign up for a heart-wrenching, heartbreaking, sob story in the back bedroom of the house with my previous slash possibly current best friend. If I had wanted that I would have bucked up the courage to speak to Heather a while ago.

"I know you're probably mad and confused and a whole bunch of other stuff, but if you let me explain, I'll make it up to you." Her eyes are wide and look as if they're about to spill boatloads of tears any minute now. I sigh. This is gonna come back and bite me in the ass, I can tell, but I can't not let her try to explain. It wouldn't be fair. This is what I get for being helplessly in love with her…

"Fine. Follow me," I say and, not looking at her once, start off in the direction of Dianna's guest room at the end of the short corridor that leads through the first floor of her house. I hear Heather's breath flutter, a sigh of relief that I'm actually willing to hear her out. She obviously didn't expect me to listen to her but honestly, I didn't either. Yet here I am, walking to what could be a pivotal moment in my life while I could be out with my friends drinking and having a grand old time. But nope. Anything for Heather. It's always been that way and—even if our friendship isn't as strong as it used to be after tonight—it always will be.

Passing the small bathroom I hear Dianna's sobs. I halt for the briefest of seconds, wanting nothing more than to burst right in there and take her into my arms. I hate seeing (or hearing) her so devastated, and I know it must be something Lea-related. Hesitating, I move onward. Dianna will be alright…I hope. Right now though, I just have to get this Heather drama out of the way.

I push open the door and allow my taller friend to enter before I slam it shut a touch more than necessary. She flinches but proceeds to sit gingerly on the guest bed.

"So. Talk." I don't feel like sugar-coating anything that's about to come. The narcissistic side of me wants her to feel bad about her actions, about what she did.

"Naya...first off, let me say that I have missed you so much. Even before what happened…in Lea's trailer," she winces but cautiously continues, "you'd been avoiding me. I've missed our talks, our lunches and early morning coffee runs. I've missed you." She whispers it, the 'you' barely there. I hear it though, and it breaks my heart even more that she missed me as a friend when I missed her as so much more.

"Yeah, well, part of that was your fault. You could have talked to me." I say coldly, trying the hardest I can to not break down in front of her.

"I can say the same for you! Sure, maybe not after I ran off that day…but you could have talked to me before that. I tried talking to you, to schedule stuff, but you kept running away! You ran off set for crying out loud. What was that even about?"

I groan, running my hands over my face in stress. "Can we do one thing at a time please?"

She huffs, clearly annoyed with the nonexistent progress she's made so far. "Fine. Why did you run off set? I want to know."

"Preferably something else first, if you don't mind?" I say snottily. I shudder at the harshness of my words but Heather acquiesces. Good.

"Whatever. I just didn't think you'd wanna jump right in to what I know you and I are both thinking about."

I hate it when she's right. Why does she have to be so damn right all the time?

Letting out a long breath, I think about my options. I could leave, just walk out of the room, to my car, and drive to nowhere in particular. But I know that would just cause even more problems and plus, Heather had the nerve to approach my so I may as well get this talk out of the way. But this, what she wants to talk about. It hurts so much to recall her running away like that, from me. Knowing I have to ask it, though, I whisper it quietly.

"Why did you run away?" I look down at my simple, black flats, wanting any distraction I can get. I can't even manage to look her in the eyes.

She doesn't answer for a while; I know she's thinking. Finally, she speaks up, not as quiet as I was but softly all the same.

"I don't know, Naya. I really don't. I know that's a terrible excuse and you probably want a real answer, but that's the truth. I was just…I was confused. And kind of…hurt. I mean, you told Lea before me, that much was obvious. And then a few days later when I was talking to her, she said that you also told Dianna." Aha. I knew it. Those two have been talking about me. They're probably been talking about Dianna, too. Damn it. I'll have to tell her. "I thought we were best friends, Naya. I mean, we are, right? I know we haven't hung out recently, but part of me wanted to give you space. It was clear you were going through something, I guess now it's kind of obvious what it was about, but I thought maybe, you know, maybe you'd come and talk to me. But you didn't."

"Heather," I start. That's not what I expected at all. The last thing I wanted to do was to hurt her. I care about her; obviously, I mean, I'm in love with the damn girl. Of course, she won't be finding that out anytime soon. "I'm sorry if I made you feel that way. You have to know that that was never my intent." My voice is softer now, gentler, and her body visibly relaxes.

"I know. I know you'd never do anything like that to me on purpose. And I'm not mad, that'd be horrible of me to be. I get that you wanted to tell people at your own rate, that's totally understandable."

"Yeah, but still Heather. I should have had the guts to talk to you first. You're right, we are best friends. I'm so sorry I didn't tell you…" I feel a single tear fall down my cheek and in a second she's by my side, pulling me down snuggly next to her on the plush comforter and brushing the tear away.

"Hey there," she coos, "no crying. I'm sorry I haven't been the greatest best friend. And just to let you know, I totally accept this, you know that right? I'm fine with you being gay or bi…whatever you are. I love you for you, okay?"

She loves me. Hah. Not as much as I love her, I can tell you that.

"I know," I say miserably. I really wasn't in the mood to get all emotional but when I'm with her, I just can't help it. Damn this feelings. "I love you, too." I'm back to whispering. I don't want her to read too deeply into the proclamation and discover that my love for her goes way past friendship.

"So…can I ask you some stuff? If not, stop me right now. I just…I'm curious." She blushes and I emit a weak chuckle. She's so cute when nervous.

"Yeah, go ahead."

"When did you first realize you were…whatever you are?"

I contemplate this. Obviously it's when I started falling for her, but since I can't exactly tell her that, I settle on a different answer.

"I don't know. I mean, when Mark and I were dating I kind of realized that I wasn't totally into it. He was more of a brother than a boyfriend but I think he thought the same of me. After we broke up I guess I started, I don't know, noticing women more and realized that Mark was probably an unconscious diversion to my real feelings."

She nods, taking everything in. "So…are you gay? Or…what?"

I nod slowly. "Yeah, I'm not bi. I-I knew something was up even when I was a younger. I just never got into the whole dating guys thing like everyone else did. I guess I was just trying to deny it. It wasn't exactly easy to admit to myself. It's still not," I mutter. I catch her glance as she notices the murmured admittance. Great. Now she knows my biggest insecurity, too.

"It's nothing to be ashamed of, Naya."

"I know," I say, a bit annoyed. I don't need her to act like my mother and tell me that everything's gonna be alright. I already know that. I know that all my friends will accept me for whoever I am. "It's just been kind of hard." I leave it at that, not wanting to do any deeper for the time being.

"I understand…wait. So is this why you ran off set?"

Whoa. Um. What was that Miss Morris? Does she know I bolted out of there because I'm in love with her? That I couldn't stand the kiss-not-kiss? That the pressure was too much to handle so I sprinted my ass to Jane's trailer faster than she could even try and get me back?

"Uh, what do you mean?" I ask as calmly as possible.

"I mean, like, I'm assuming this year has been you figuring stuff out, and with the whole Brittana thing, is that why?"

Phew.

"Kind of, yeah…" Hey, it's half the truth. "It didn't seem fair to you since you didn't know then…I didn't wanna be, you know, there kissing you. It seemed kind of…bad."

"Naya! You've got to be kidding me, right? That's ridiculous! I don't care that you're gay, alright?"

Ughhh. I wish she'd just stop saying that word. "I know you don't. But you didn't know then, so it seemed like it was just unfair or something."

"Well whatever, it's in the past. Consider it forgotten. I appreciate that you were looking out for me but really, it's fine. I'm just glad you're talking to me. I've missed you so much." She trails off quietly and looks away. Something seems to be bothering her, lingering in her eyes. I don't know what it is, and part of me wants to, but I don't feel like asking her. One, I don't want to push her. But another part of my brain is yelling not to trust her. It's hard to jump right back into our friendship like nothing happened. Because something did. And it was big. I mean, she ran away. She. Ran. Away. It hurt. And sure, maybe I hurt her a bit in the process, but I'm freaking in love with her. And she'll never know.

Heather moves away from me and stands up, pulling me up with her. She looks into my eyes and pushes a few locks of hair away from my face. Engulfing me into a tight hug, she holds me close, as if she'll never be able to touch me again. I hug her back just as strongly. I've missed cuddling with her. I really have. That Heather shaped hole in my heart has been growing day by day in size and with emptiness. When we pull away, I smile at her, looking right into those beautiful blue eyes of hers. A few more tears have made their way down my face but she just wipes them away.

"Thank you," I whisper.

"You're welcome," she answers just as quietly. She doesn't even need to know what I'm thanking her for, she just knows. The fact that she accepts me, that she decided to talk to me. It all means so much more to me than she can imagine.

"C'mon," she says, clasping our hands together, "let's join the party, hmm?"

I nod, holding on to her tight. Walking out of the doorway, we make our way back to the living room. Passing the bathroom, I peek my head in. Dianna's nowhere to be seen. Good. Maybe she rejoined everyone else. I hope so. It's what she needs, some talk, some alcohol, some friends, and, of course, some Glee.

I pull Heather into the kitchen before we head into the living room, knowing we'll both need a drink. I don't know about her, but I may need many. Coming into the small room, we're met with Dianna and Lea staring at each other intently, steam practically pouring out of both of their ears. Lea's mouth is open, as if she's yelling or about to scream her head off. Apparently I'm right.

"WELL IT'S NOT MY FAULT YOU'RE IN LOVE WITH ME, DIANNA!"

"What the fuck?"

Oops.

I slap my hand over my mouth. Did I really just say that aloud? Dianna wasn't insensitive when I told her about me, that is not have I should have reacted. Damn it, Naya!

Lea's and Dianna's heads whip towards us. They both look down at Heather's and mine conjoined hands then look back up into our eyes. Dianna looks absolutely terrified and tears are running down her face, promptly messing up her prettily makeup-ed face. Both of their mouths are opening and closing yet nothing is coming out except stuttering 'um's and confused blubbers.

Well. This could be an interesting night. I guess I finally know what's been going on between them, though.

Hm. This certainly wasn't the kind of party I was expecting.

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><p><strong>Note: I plan on writing a Nayanna story soon. So for all those who wanted it, please look for it in the near future!<strong>


	8. Lea Say What? Part II

**A/N: Sorry for the slight wait. I've been busy with school and other things. I know, excuses, excuses. Anyways, thank you, as per usual, to those who favorited and alerted. However! I love you guys dearly but would love for you to review, as well. I take what ya'll say into consideration for my writing. I'll even incorporate your ideas into the story. Special thanks goes to woo, crazyfornaya, joyce, Sonia, and SGA Firenity for reviewing. Again, it means a lot to me. I especially want to thank SGA Firenity for your constant reviews! It means the world to me. **

**Note: This chapter is shorter than usual, and for that I am sorry. I got serious writer's block and just wanted to finish this little party of theirs up. Not my favorite chapter but I still hope ya'll enjoy it. **

**Note: Achele is out. I know I had mixed feelings on it at the beginning of the story but it's gone. HOWEVER. I say that because Heya will happen eventually, and I don't really want everything to be all happy and fluffy...for _all_ the characters, at least. Think of that as you may. **

**Note: In case ya'll didn't know, I recently posted a Nayanna fic. It's on my profile if you want to check it out; I know many of you wanted Nayanna in this story so I wrote a separate one. **

**Disclaimer: Glee does not belong to me. This fic is unbeta'd so any mistakes are mine.**

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><p>Silence.<p>

It's the only thing I hear, or rather, don't hear. I'm sure the same goes for the other three; they're all looking around aimlessly as well. I strain my ears to pinpoint even the tiniest breath out of Lea, Dianna, or Heather.

Nothing.

Letting the sounds outside of the kitchen enter my head, I make out the muffled scream of Chris who, no doubt, is being easily thrown onto Jenna's small body. In any other occasion, I'd wish I was there. I love those silly moments we have as cast; those memories are some of the only things that tide me over when I'm in a really bad spot, such as the past few weeks have been with all this Heather drama going on. Clinging to those fun times is what got me through.

But now? Now, in this specific instant, I really couldn't care less.

I inhale deeply, puffing my cheeks up with a full supply of air. After a moment I let it all out, the stream of my exhale the only noise evident in Dianna's tiny kitchenette. Finally deciding to break the tenseness, I open my mouth to speak. Before I can utter a word, Dianna sniffles and lets out a high-pitched squeak of sorts. As the tears continue to stream down her face as if they're gushing waterfalls, dangerous and overflowing, she runs out of the room. Lea flinches, as if Dianna was somehow connected to her and by running away she ripped a part of their conjoined body to fragments. She goes to move after her but stops, running her hands over her face and backing up against the island in the middle of the room.

"What have I done?" she murmurs to herself, groaning. I carefully remove my hand from Heather's, who stands unmoving, puzzlement written all over her face. Damn it. I really hate keeping her out of the loop, but knowing what I do now, I'm almost sure of the reason both Dianna and Lea have been acting strangely. My mind keeps wandering off to thoughts of Heather, of our resolved yet unresolved issues, but I push them away, needing nothing more right now than to concentrate on someone besides myself.

"Heather," I start, staring at Lea the whole time. I make a step towards her and the tiny brunette looks up. Her face is stained with fresh tear tracks but at least she isn't crying at the moment. "Why don't you head into the living room? I…I think I need to talk to Lea here."

I hear unfinished words and short intakes of breath; obviously she's trying to decide if she should listen to me or not.

"Fine," she finally says. Her voice is soft yet harsh at the same time. I wince. I really do feel bad for ditching her, but I know what I need to do. Lea and Dianna are most definitely not getting over whatever this is by themselves—they may not readily admit it, but the two of them, though incredibly sweet, can really be hard headed sometimes—and it wouldn't be right of me to just walk away as if nothing happened. They need me. And honestly, both of them were there for me when I needed them. What kind of friend would I be if I let them flounder in the wake of their definite argument on their own?

Heather moves past me to reach for a beer on the island. Lea moves to the side quickly. Heather gives her an odd look but makes it sympathetic all the same. Passing me, she squeezes my shoulder lightly. She doesn't say anything, but I can tell from the look her eyes are engraining into the side of my face and from her slight touch that a million words are being said. Perhaps they're saying 'we have a lot more to talk about' or 'what the hell just happened'. I don't know. Maybe both. But I don't ask and she doesn't say anything so for now, I ignore her.

"Should I go check on Dianna?" she asks softly.

"No," I quickly respond. That's the last thing I want her to do right now. After I talk to Lea—which I don't really want to do at all; I'm only doing it because we're still friends—I'm going to hunt Dianna down at all costs, even if I get mauled over by Cory in the process (which, judging by tonight's actions of him tossing people around like they're a sack of potatoes, could easily happen). Dianna seems to have been hurt more than Lea and though I love both of them dearly, my loyalties currently lie with the blonde. She's been there for me and so I'll be there for her; though my earlier statement after Lea's outburst may not have been the prime thing to say. I'll have to make it up to her.

"O-kay..." Heather mutters, confusion lacing her voice. I know she wants to know more, that she'll be pelting me with questions as soon as the night's over, but I don't have it in myself to explain it right now. She exits through the entryway of the kitchen and glances down the hall, as if trying to decide to disregard my heeding or not. Finally she turns away and walks into the living room, jumping atop Cory's and Chris's entangled bodies rolling around on the floor. She's one that's able to move on from a situation calmly, if she gets a sufficient explanation later on that is. I guess she knows I'll fill her in with all the juicy details eventually; she knows me too well. I'd do anything for that girl. Fucking anything.

Watching her closely for one more moment to make sure she's easily getting back into the swing of the night, I swivel my head back to Lea, who's currently wiping away remaining tears with a corner of her sleeve. I stand there awkwardly and wait for her to make the first move. She coughs slightly and goes to speak. Thank God. I'm totally biased and on Dianna's side right now; I'm too afraid of what I would have said, or rather yelled, if I had been the first one to talk.

"Listen Naya," she starts, her voice shaky. I can tell she's trying her hardest to compose herself and so don't interrupt. "I-I realize that you're probably really confused right now, but the first thing you need to know is that I don't want you to be wrapped up in mine and Dianna's problems. It's really not fair to you. You have your own things going on with Heather and what not, and I don't want to add to your stress. So…"

"Lea," I say, astonished. I may not want to have this exact conversation, but I still care about them. "You've got to be kidding me, right? I care about you and Dianna, okay? I'm not going to stand here like nothing happened and waltz right back on out there. I wanna help. I knew something was up with you two, I just knew it," I add in a mumble under my breath. She rolls her eyes and I look downwards.

"Sorry."

"Whatever," she says. A few seconds of quiet pass and the sound of Heather's contagious laugh erupts. I smile to myself and apparently Lea sees me.

"Speaking of Heather, I see you two worked things out."

This immediately wipes the grin off my face. Comforting Lea made me forget all about what she did; she talked to Heather about me without my permission and, more specifically, talked to her knowing that I had confided in her about something that only, at the time, two other people knew about.

"Kind of," I settle on. We still have a lot to talk about after all, and Heather's nowhere near close to discovering my other secret, one that I'm sure could tear us apart in a matter of seconds.

Lea just scoffs. "Kind of? Naya, you were holding hands when you walked in here. That's the old Naya slash Heather I'm used to."

"Yeah, well not everything is always as perfect as it seems, got it?" I instantly regret the biting tone of my words; Lea's back to sniffling and before I can get a grasp on what's happening, she's walking up to me, shoving herself into my arms.

"Oh, Lea." I pull her in for a hug and rub circles on her back.

"I-I'm such a b-bad person. Dianna's gonna h-hate me for the rest of our lives, I just know i-it."

"Hey there." I don't know exactly what's going on, but I'm aware of enough to know that that is certainly most NOT the case. Dianna loves Lea, as a friend and, now, maybe more. Either way, though, I'm positive that she could never stop loving her; she's too kind-hearted and forgiving.

"She's not going to hate you, okay? She loves you."

"Yeah. Exactly. She loves me. And I don't love her back."

"Um…" It's all I can manage. What the hell's she talking about?

"No, no," she says quickly as she sees my questioning expression. "Of course I love her. As a friend, though, nothing more. And she…she…" Lea grasps onto me tighter, holding on like her life depends on it.

Oh great, more tears. I know that'll I be getting plenty more than this when I go and track Dianna down, so I just ignore the growing wet spots on my shirt and let her cry.

"She's in love with me," Lea says after her sobs have died down some, her voice deflating at the end of it. I nod slowly, the understanding of everything finally sinking in. I guess it was pretty obvious. I'll never tell Dianna that, no, but when you think about it, when you rewind and replay all those little details that to the average person may seem grossly unimportant, it's all there.

"But you're not in love withher, am I right?" She nods miserably.

"Naya, what the fuck did I do? I messed everything up."

"Shhh," I coo into her ear, stroking her soft, brown hair. "I'm sure that's not true. Just give it time, Lea. She'll forgive you, she'll move on. Just give it time."

It's all I can think of to say. I was never really good at the encouraging pep talks and reassuring talks of, well, reassurance. Sure, I'm good at _listening_ to them, good at having them been said to _me_, but when it comes time for me to reciprocate the action to all those who helped me through tough times, I freeze up. Thoughts just seem to disappear out of my head.

"Yeah, right. She's gonna hate me. I really screwed up this time, Naya. You have no idea. We've had this argument before, countless times, actually."

This earns Lea a raise of my eyebrows and she shakes her head, raising her right hand to wave it off. "Another time. The point is, she came to me again and I rejected her…again. I freaked out more than I usually do at her. And on top of all that, she'll probably never excuse the fact that I yelled it aloud. And now you and Heather know, and who knows, maybe everyone else heard it from the other room, too. And, and—"

"Lea." I clamp my hand over her mouth and her eyes go wide. Her eyebrows crinkle in and I know she's pouting, but I really don't give a damn. I just needed a way to shut her up. I have to admit, she really is like Rachel Berry sometimes. The talking thing? I'm pretty sure Rachel talks so much because Lea unconsciously adds a touch of herself to her character. Sure, it's cute; fans either love it or want to poke their eyes out because of Rachel's incessant annoyingness, but in real life Lea's bantering can get to be somewhat of a bother…sometimes. Only sometimes. I mean, really. You can't _not_ love Lea Michele.

"Stop. Talking. Just for a minute. Can you do that? Good," I say with a satisfied smirk. "Now listen to me. Dianna is one of the nicest people I know. She _will_ forgive you, I can promise you that. Also. No one heard you guys, alright? It was just me and Heather and that's only because we walked in on you. Everyone's out there having a blast; trust me."

Lea's tiny frame relaxes a fraction of an inch. "I guess so…"

"I _know_ so. Everything's going to be okay, really. Hell, I didn't think stuff would work out between Heather and me and now look at us; we were holding hands for crying out loud, you said it yourself." I brace myself for a mini outburst; I didn't totally want to bring my own problems up. I figured it'd either be more comforting for her or she'd get annoyed that I was thinking about myself when this is clearly about her. She starts to talk and I sigh as I realize my first thought was correct.

"You're right. But still. I feel awful. I wish I could love her back, I really do, but I…I _can't_. You can't help who you fall in love with."

"I'll say," I mutter under my breath. One of her eyebrows raises and I blush, looking away from her gaze. I still haven't officially told Lea that, not only am I gay, but I'm also in love with my best friend, and I really don't want to cross that bridge tonight. Choosing to ignore my words, though, she continues.

"What do I do?"

This throws me off guard. Like I said, I'm not too great with consolatory-type stuff. I guess that's where Santana gets it.

"I…I don't know, Lea. I wish I did, but I don't. All I can say is that she'll get over this and you'll figure something out. I know you guys; you're awesome, sweet, and intelligent people and I have faith in you. It might be tough for the next couple days, hell, maybe even weeks, but I know you'll work things out."

"How the hell am I going to get through work having to see her every day?"

I stay silent for a moment, knowing exactly how to do it. You avoid her, by all means. Walk away at the slightest glance; excuse yourself to the bathroom when she enters a conversation with you and another friend. Then again, that's probably more along the lines of what I'll have to tell Dianna. Lea probably _wants_ to see her, to talk to her, to clean the metaphorical cut and put a princess Band-Aid over it to protect it forever.

"You'll figure it out, believe me."

I can tell by the way she's looking at me that she knows there's something more about me that I'm not letting on about. She doesn't push though—thank _God_—and sighs deeply.

"Thanks, Naya."

"No problem."

A few minutes of strange peacefulness follow. It seems odd that the silence wouldn't be awkward and, not only is it not _awkward_, it's surprisingly _calm_.

"I guess I should go talk to Dianna then…" I whisper lightly. Lea nods, barely visibly.

"Guess so."

I give her a gentle hug and walk out of the kitchen, leaving Lea to herself, her thoughts, her tears, and a room full of alcohol.

Off to find Dianna.


End file.
